Ever HEARD a Guitar Crack?

[Bob Womack]

And here I thought it was just about joke about gas.

Bob

[Chipotle]

Originally Posted by Matts67

No, but I've heard a tree fall in the woods

Wait, you heard a tree fall in the woods?! I thought nobody was supposed to be around to hear that.

I can tell you, however, that large, leafy branches breaking and crashing down in the middle of a huge snowstorm sound a lot like bottle rockets being shot off.

I hope I don't have to hear a guitar split, ever.

[Wade Hampton]

Back when I played Irish music for a living I was playing a St. Patrick’s Day gig at what was basically my home club, a bar called Irish Eyes on Lincoln Avenue in Chicago. Being St. Pat’s, of course the place was packed. I was playing some lively reels and polkas on dulcimer and had my Mossman guitar on a stand when a young guy my age, quite expensively dressed, slammed so hard into the monitor speaker that it fell over onto the guitar’s top. I heard it crack because it was so loud that the sound carried over the roar of the crowd.

The jerk laughed and walked away. I took my break right then, put down my dulcimer and picked up the guitar, then saw the crack and jumped down into the crowd to catch up to the guy to try to get him to cover the cost of the repairs.

I caught up with him. He saw the P.O.ed expression on my face and tried to walk away from me but I grabbed his arm and clamped down hard. “You broke my guitar!!” I yelled at him.

I was about ready to punch him, and I think he saw that. “I put a twenty in the tip jar!” he shouted. “That’s not going to be enough to pay for the work!!” I shouted back. “That’s all the cash I had on me!” he lied.

Because he was lying about putting any money in the tip jar, too, the scumbag. There was some money in it, but no twenties.

I looked around, blood in my eye, ready to ask Peter, the bartender from County Waterford who was my buddy, to get some of the Irish-born regulars to brace that guy for the money to fix the guitar. But as drunk, arrogant and entitled as the jerk obviously was, he was still smart enough to get out of the place before that could happen. He was nowhere in sight.

Here’s this guy wearing a tailor-made suit that cost as much as a new car, and he thought it was cute to break a working musician’s guitar and weasel out of paying to fix it. He and his drinking buddies probably laughed about what a devil-may-care fellow he was, with him starring as the mischievous imp who broke a musician’s guitar, then lied to get out of paying for the damage.

What a lovable scamp!

The feelings I have that still remain vivid all these years later can only be expressed in language that - at the very least - would get me suspended from this family-friendly forum for at least two weeks. So you’re going to need to use your own imaginations and concoct the vilest curses you can come up with, then say them with the slight Southern twang that my Yankee wife tells me still colors my speech.

That’ll give you a more authentic sense of how deeply angry that incident made me feel.

Of course, when you play in bars that’s a risk you run, and I knew that going in. So I paid for the repair work myself, of course.

That lying sack of well-dressed fecal matter never set foot in Irish Eyes again. Neither Peter or I ever saw the guy again.

But I’m still ever-so-slightly irked about what happened, in case you couldn’t tell...

As for the guitar I got it repaired and it continued to serve as my main stage guitar until I my 000-42 some ten years later.

And I had a genuine “learning experience” in dealing with a member of the Great American Public!


Wade Hampton “Still Angry? Why, What Gives You THAT Idea?!” Miller

[SpruceTop]

I haven't heard a guitar crack but I've heard a bone bridge saddle crack with a clearly audible ping on my now traded Larrivee D-40R Legacy. Sure enough, when I looked, there it was, a vertical crack between the 1st and 2nd strings!

[Podicle]

I heard my Larrivee SD-50 crack from the next room. Last year was the worst drought on record in sub-tropical Eastern Australia and for the first time in 40 years of playing guitar we had humidity levels low enough to injure instruments. It was something I had read about but not seen. I heard the crack, came into the room, looked around without seeing anything, and it was only later that I picked up the guitar and noticed a centreline crack on the top. It repaired perfectly. On checking my other acoustics I found a crack down the fingerboard of my Larrivee D-09. It was also readily repaired. I then bought a room humidifier but have not seen levels drop below 55% since so have had no need to use it.

[vld]

Did not hear it. But it was lot of fun...

I had a gig twenty years ago. Czech writer was reading from his new book, three songs from us, another chapter, three songs and so on. I took (at that time eight months pregnant) wife with me.

Eight songs later she started to give birth to our daughter :-)

Fast forward: five in the morning, I am a proud father. It is January, the temperature is under 15°C bellow zero (which is 5°F). A car is parked in front of a hospital. Whole night. Ovation is in a trunk.

The crack runs over the whole top, parallel to grain approx. 2 inches above the soundhole. I left it as a reminder of the "pack in three minutes and drive through the children playground and someone else's garden because the street is blocked" adventure. Eight years later my daughter's godmother wanted to start to learn to play. The guitar seemed to be a perfect gift.

My daughter plays either my guitars or her LaPatrie and Stratocaster for last eleven years

[TJN]

After reading these posts, I'm never taking my guitars our of their cases again.
Obviously only kidding and sympathies' to all who have suffered similar incidents.

[Malcolm Kindnes]

I've posted this before in relation to humidity issues, but it will do no harm to post it again, this was not really a crack, more of an explosion.

We had a very cold winter 2010/2011 and obviously the cold air is dry, but in the north west of Ireland it's generally damp anyway so we don't really think about excessive dryness. My McIlroy had been on a stand for a few days in my living room and unbeknownst to me had been drying out, aided and abetted by my underfloor heating and heat exchange system.

I was in another room one evening minding my own business when there was an incredible bang, I really thought one of my large double glazed windows had exploded. I ran into the room and at first could see no damage anywhere, then as I looked around I discovered that the bridge had literally exploded off the top of the guitar.

Dermot repaired it but explained that it was just too dry, the cedar top obviously shrank far more than the ebony bridge and broke the glue joint quite dramatically.

[DungBeatle]

Originally Posted by bufflehead

Someone sat on my ukulele at a party years ago. That was a sound I never want to hear again. More of a snap than a crack, but quite dramatic.

My age old soprano ukulele was sitting raw on the back seat of my '56 Chevy, 2 door, when a bunch of stoned, drunken kids all piled in. That crunch was totally heart breaking!
~Bob

[Walterc]

Originally Posted by Wade Hampton

... had my Mossman guitar on a stand when a young guy my age, quite expensively dressed, slammed so hard into the monitor speaker that it fell over onto the guitar’s top. I heard it crack because it was so loud that the sound carried over the roar of the crowd.

I have sort of done the opposite. I went to a small club with a tiny stage and sat in the front row. While the performer was playing another instrument his guitar fell over and off the stage. I caught it before it hit the floor and no damage was done. I was quite pleased with myself and I think he was too. I don't remember what kind of guitar it was, but do remember the other instrument was a cittern (I think the performer was Gerald Trimble).

With my own guitar, I had it leaning against a desk when it slowly slid across the desk and landed flat. I was just too slow to catch it. The neck split like a piece of green wood. I got it repaired and it worked fine afterward, but I could still feel where it cracked

[Rick Jones]

I'm notbcompletely sure how this happened, but I used to do this percussive thing gigging out, and one time the preamp or lead to my internal mic/transducer output failed, I hadn't realised, and I couldn't hear my 'thumps' so I think I wailed on it a bit too hard and I am reasonably sure I heard/felt something go.

It's been like it for about 7 years, and I asked a luthier on Denmark St. if I should get it fixed, he listened to it and said "it sounds fine, I'd leave it". So I have. It's gotten no worse tbh.

[Steve DeRosa]

Originally Posted by Tomb0

...I spoke to a couple of different luthiers, and it appears that this is not a particularly rare or critically damaging event...

Kiln. Dried. Woods. ...

[tonyo]

yes, I heard my guitar crack and it's unbelievably loud. It's not a sound I'd recommend anyone go chasing. It's been repaired and the guitar sounds good. The fact that it's been cracked is still visible. It's right down the middle of the back.

[Acousticado]

Back in ‘08 while winter vacationing in Florida, I’d taken my Baby Taylor with me and one day while getting ready to go for a drive in the rented convertible, my wife was looking for something in the trunk and placed the guitar is the space where you’re not supposed to place anything and she forgot to move it back when closing the trunk lid. I then proceeded to put the top down. Crrruuunnnccchhh! I knew right away what happened and my heart was in my throat. It was damaged beyond repair. My wife felt really bad and insisted I get another guitar. In reality, I was never that enamoured with the BT but bought one as a travel guitar. I immediately bought a Composite Acoustics Cargo which I still have and love. Far better than the BT, punches way beyond its small stature.

[ClaptonWannabe2]

Played my Alvarez outside once. Cool AC house to SE Texas summer evening.

I swear as I looked down at the neck off and on changing chords the neck was bending/warping. Took it inside and it was out of tune.