New job not good

[Ludere]

I was once in a very similar situation. Horrible person - worst 'boss' I ever had; did everything you're NOT supposed to do regarding motivation, respect, team building, etc. Just awful.
I kept records, I bit my tongue (a lot), I waited until I felt certain that I had enough evidence so that something would have to be "done", and then I went to her boss about it.
Big mistake ... he listened intently, agreed that the behavior was unsatisfactory and assured me he would look into it. No matter how often I asked and got more assurances, nothing ever got resolved.
About a month or so after that, I got transferred to a different location and lo and behold my position there got "downsized" 4 months later and I was let go.
I am very good at what I do, I have never been "let go" from any other job, ever.
I went to HR and told them the whole story and they said they'd look into it ... well you can guess how that turned out. My dismissal was determined to be "purely the result of downsizing" ... and that was that.
Clearly I handled the situation poorly, but in any event I didn't have the money for an attorney so basically I was out of luck ...

That all being said; I wouldn't waste too many cycles trying to "fix" this person or the situation.
Yes, I would document everything and keep detailed accounts of his/her behavior, but I would make my primary goal to find another job and get out of there ASAP.
I wouldn't even flame her on the way out the door; that will only feel good for about 30 seconds and then you have an enemy at the management level in your professional community.

I know they don't deserve any consideration, but you're talking about your survival here, not theirs ... play the 'long game'.

...

[Don Lampson]

Originally Posted by GHS

I'm going to relate a little story about a problem a co-worker had and how he resolved it. I will use the word "I" in place of "he" so the story flows better. I would bring a leather shoulder bag to work to carry my items. I had a co worker ( who had a bit of authority over me) that would rummage thru the bag when it was on the floor along side my desk. Sometimes he would pull out an item and hold it up and make some comment on it and others in the room would see this and laugh at bit. He was asked to stop but did not. It got to be too much. After about a year of this one day I walked into the supervisor's office and said " I had an envelope in my bag and its gone. It had three hundred dollars in it as I was going to "guitar center" after work to purchase some items. "Joe" was going thru the bag and others saw him". Other workers were brought into the office to confirm he has been in the bag and they confirmed it. He was called in and given a choice...go to the local PD for theft or take a walk and dont come back. The moral is...you can push good people to do bad things if pushed far enough. Was it nice?...no, was it morally wrong?...yes...did "Mike" keep his job and stopped being harassed? yes. If you are going to mess with people remember that paybacks take many forms. I'm no endorsing this but relating how far some will go when pushed.

Some of the advice offered seems downright outrageous, IMHO! I fail to see how using deceit, like claiming a false theft, pretending to be gay, or faking an injury, is an acceptable way to get even with a bad boss? Before I'd do any such a thing, I'd simply walk away, and go find another job!

It appears there are far more issues involved with the OP's situation than just a lousy supervisor? I hope he gets his numerous problems resolved, and this whole saga will have some sort of a happy ending?

Don

[TomB'sox]

I think there have been several, and probably enough suggestions given here to help or not...some have been arguably unethical. For this reason, I believe this thread has run its course.

Thank you all for trying to help a fellow AGF member in need.