A Gentleman's Guide to Christmas Shopping for His Wife

Bob Womack · #1 11-26-2021, 07:40 AM

In the lives of some husbands, Christmas shopping time looms as a time of discomfort. I've noticed that around this time of year, forums begin to ring with the anxious cries as good men uproot generous chunks of what hair they have left while trying to figure out what to give their wives. This year, supply chain issues have complicated the situation and served as a warning that you better swoop in early and get your gifts because stocks are low... and once they are gone they are GONE.

I have a system for that. Lord willing, I will make it through the season with joy... and even fun. I have shared my home with a beautiful, kind woman for forty-one years at this point. Over that time I've created a system that allows me to navigate Christmas shopping for my wife with aplomb and vigor and to bring some small joy to her heart on Christmas morning. I eventually even wrote up a small treatise on my system and posted it on my webpage.

So... Every year around this time I update the webpage that contains my "Gentleman's Guide to Christmas Shopping for His Wife - The Food Groups System" and post it to my favorite forums as an encouragement and comfort to you, my friends. You can find it HERE.

Happy and successful hunting... and gift-giving!!!

Bob

619TF · #2 11-27-2021, 08:44 AM

Here's my system for figuring out what to get the S.O....
Ask for a list of items with a rating from 1 to 5 as to how much it is desired with the understanding that they will not be receiving every item listed. Simple, no guessing and keeps the stress way down. Some of you guys need to try it some time. It's called communication if your S.O. questions the methodology. They usually like that stuff and so should understand and make it easy for YOU!

Mr. Jelly · #3 11-27-2021, 08:58 AM

Gee I might even buy my wife something this year.

Acousticado · #4 11-27-2021, 09:35 AM

I maintain a Christmas and birthday list in “Notes” in my iPad. Throughout the year, I’m always listening and watching for clues as to what my wife and other family members may need or want, then add to my list. I pay particular attention to sentimental gifts, both tangible and intangible, ones that touch the heart. One Christmas, I’d written a song for my wife with a theme that I knew was special to her and I played it for her with family present on Christmas morning as one of her gifts. That was the one she loved the most.

Leading up to last Christmas, our daughter-in-law had expressed in passing that in the spring she’d like to buy an 8’x10’ raised garden bed full enclosure (with door) from Costco. It was pricey, so I approached my son and offered that if he’d help me, he and I could build her a 12’x16’ cedar/chicken wire (with door) much cheaper where my wife and I would pay for the materials. I did up a personalized home made gift certificate on the computer with an image of the one from Costco which we gave to her Christmas morning. She was super happy. My son and I built it this past spring, a great father/son/daughter-in-law project, the grown produce turned out fantastic and we all enjoyed the rewards of the harvest. Win-win-win.

Often, I’m doing this sort of gift giving. It’s just a matter of always being observant, making mental notes, writing them down, then buying or building.

imwjl · #5 11-27-2021, 10:09 AM

I think shopping for the correct spouse is most important. Don't get rid of one that's good if you already have one but here are my tips.

Same height is good even though a lot of cars do have memory control for seats and mirrors. This feature really helps with sharing sports toys and strength. For a good guitar analogy, look something like OM or 000 with 28 level design and trim. You want that versatility, not too fat or skinny, and the cosmetics that are basic showing off the natural design.

These features make the shopping fast and easy. While friends are thinking of boutiques, jewelry, nights out, fancy trips, all I have to do is basic home plumbing. For Black Friday, all I had to do was bring home pears, cheese and water softener salt.

emtsteve · #6 11-27-2021, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Acousticado

I maintain a Christmas and birthday list in “Notes” in my iPad. Throughout the year, I’m always listening and watching for clues as to what my wife and other family members may need or want, then add to my list. I pay particular attention to sentimental gifts, both tangible and intangible, ones that touch the heart. One Christmas, I’d written a song for my wife with a theme that I knew was special to her and I played it for her with family present on Christmas morning as one of her gifts. That was the one she loved the most.

Leading up to last Christmas, our daughter-in-law had expressed in passing that in the spring she’d like to buy an 8’x10’ raised garden bed full enclosure (with door) from Costco. It was pricey, so I approached my son and offered that if he’d help me, he and I could build her a 12’x16’ cedar/chicken wire (with door) much cheaper where my wife and I would pay for the materials. I did up a personalized home made gift certificate on the computer with an image of the one from Costco which we gave to her Christmas morning. She was super happy. My son and I built it this past spring, a great father/son/daughter-in-law project, the grown produce turned out fantastic and we all enjoyed the rewards of the harvest. Win-win-win.

Often, I’m doing this sort of gift giving. It’s just a matter of always being observant, making mental notes, writing them down, then buying or building.

Well played, Tom!

And Bob, well written and useful article for us husbands/boyfriends/significant others out here who struggle coming up with ideas.

Thanks!

rokdog49 · #7 11-27-2021, 01:13 PM

I know this isn’t really the discussion but… first off my wife is not materialistic…really!
Those days are gone for her (and me )
She doesn’t care about gifts. Our family at Christmas is the gift she loves the most.
Still get her something, but it doesn’t matter to her what it is and I don’t spend much time in pursuit of it.
Pretty nice.

tbeltrans · #8 11-27-2021, 01:22 PM

Here is how ours was handled this year...

Our refrigerator died in the early morning hours of Thanksgiving day. I tried to get a service guy to come out and take a look, but they all seem to be booked up until well past when our food will remain edible.

This morning we went to a very highly regarded, locally owned family appliance store and my wife picked out the refrigerator she wanted. We were extremely fortunate that the installation guy had not yet left for home for the day especially since he is booked up next week, so within an hour of purchasing the refrigerator, it was delivered, installed and ready to go, with the old one hauled away.

So, that was Christmas for us. I see no guitars in the near future (but then I have plenty of high quality instruments already), but at least we have food. We are very fortunate how well this worked out, so no complaints.

Tony

Steve DeRosa · #9 11-27-2021, 02:46 PM

I and mine both play, and when MandoBros was our friendly neighborhood guitar store we did our one-stop Christmas shopping there...

Since then it's catch-as-catch-can - if we see it we buy it while the getting is good, regardless of time of year...

The Watchman · #10 11-27-2021, 03:25 PM

The first few years, we kept buying each other gifts that neither if us liked. Once I bought the exact same watch for her, two years in a row, even after she returned the first one. So then we started buying gifts for each other that were actually for ourselves, like the TV for the kitchen she bought me, so "I" could watch cooking shows in the kitchen. And the flatscreen monitor I bought for "her".

Now we've grown up and don't buy anything for each other, so she can concentrate on gifts for the kids and family, while I concentrate on watching TV.

tbeltrans · #11 11-27-2021, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steve DeRosa

I and mine both play, and when MandoBros was our friendly neighborhood guitar store we did our one-stop Christmas shopping there...

Since then it's catch-as-catch-can - if we see it we buy it while the getting is good, regardless of time of year...

We do this too. During the course of the year, we each buy the things we want/need as they show up used or on sale, or whatever makes economic sense, including passing the item up.

The refrigerator I mentioned earlier cost enough that whatever we might have done for the holiday, we simply won't this year. We always pay off our bills before incurring more and never carry debt at the end of the month. As my wife used to remind me in the high GAS days, you can only spend it once, meaning that if it is on the credit card, it isn't in the bank.

Tony

Cypress Knee · #12 11-27-2021, 08:52 PM

I hinted to my wife that I had enough disposal income to splurge on something and asked if there was anything she really, really wanted. She said, "Why don't you just put the money into my kitchen re-model account."

Having said that, I do appreciate Bob's list. There some ideas in there for sure.

Dirk Hofman · #13 11-28-2021, 11:19 AM

I know it's crazy, but I just talk to my wife. Spend time with her, notice what she wants. Then through the year I add ideas to a google doc. No need for categories or guessing. Works well.

ewalling · #14 11-28-2021, 12:28 PM

...............................

Don Lampson · #15 11-28-2021, 09:44 PM

Unfortunately! I have no wife, but fortunately, I did stumble into a meaningful relationship 40 years ago with a beautiful young gal, who loves me all to crazy - Still! Better yet, she choose a solid career, and has money of her own... To top it all off, she became an heiress, thanks to he penny pinching mother, and can buy any reasonable thing she needs, or wants...

Thankfully, I find myself in a similar situation... Both of us are hesitant to break a dollar, and extra fortunately, we have enough to be happy, without an annual present of some kind....

We have 365 Christmases a year just being together, and feel no need for gifts on, or about, Dec. 25.....

Don