Life turning points

[Cypress Knee]

Looking back on my life, there were two (well three) major turning points.

Summer of 1966. I was ten years old. My father had been sent to Southeast Asia by the Air Force, and he moved my mother and family to be close to his mother, just in case. I was watching TV with my grandmother when she said to me, "Jimmie, you should go to college and make yourself into a doctor or a lawyer, or a preacher man." From that moment on I decided that I was going to college, and without guidance from any adult, took college prep courses all through high school. To this day, I am the only member of my family with a college degree, and the only one who got out.

Memorial Day Weekend 2000. I attended a Tony Robbins "Unleash The Power Within" seminar complete with a Firewalk. Afterwards, I told myself, "I am out of the financial services business, I am going to open up my own specialty retail store." I had a very good run, eventually sold out and left on the front page of the local newspaper. What a life-changer.

The third turning point is a bit more complicated. As a young Army comunications officer in Korea I told my assignments officer that I wanted to go to Ranger School upon my return to the states. He was initially dismissive but eventually gave me a billet. Everybody else was Infantry. I only had one opportunity, as approximately 2/3 of the classes were recycled. I barely made it out of the infirmary after suffering a life-threatening celluitis infection.

Eventually I was assigned to the 82nd Airborne Division. I soon learned that the 2-505 Airborne Infantry was looking for a communications officer as they had just relieved the former from duty.

I went in to interview. The commanding officer, Lieutenant Colonel Keith Nightingale, said "Before we even start this interview, do you have a Ranger Tab?".

Well, I did and I was "hired". That eventually led to a company command in the 7th Special Forces Group.

Anyway, my experiences with Task Force 2-505 and 7th SFGA continue to shape my life to this day - because of that Ranger tab.

[fitness1]

A few years back I started a thread about this....as we age it sure gives perspective on how we ended up where we are.

https://www.acousticguitarforum.com/...hlight=pivotal

[Mr. Paul]

I applied for civil service employment in the mid 1970s. You didn't apply for a specific job, just entered the system. If you got a job offer, it could be for any one of hundreds of positions, anywhere in the country.

I'd grown up on the east coast, went to school in the midwest, and was still there after graduation. Got the phone call on a Thursday afternoon ... if I was able to report on Monday, there was a job available in Glacier Park for the summer as a customs/immigration guard on the Canadian border.

So random, and it changed everything. Fell in love with the mountains, and that has affected every major decision that followed, including where I live today.

[Murphy Slaw]

I was gigging, getting paid for it, drinking beer, smoking cigarettes and hanging out in bars at age 17 in Arizona when the legal age was 19. Older women loved me, being a young guitar player and such.

I got clean in my 40's, sober and quit the cigarettes in my very early 50's.

Looking back, those were bad choices, but at the time......

[rmp]

I like this topic. it makes you think

For me, it was during first grade.

I wound up out of school for quite a bit of that year.

A fall into a swamp in the fall of that year, where I apparently ingested some nasty water, which turned into I believe a case of sepsis and almost ended my life.

I was 6 I think at the time. Later that spring I wound up in the hospital to have tonsils removed.

My mom and dad had (mostly Mom) made the decision to make me repeat first grade since I'd missed most of it due to absence. I could have gone on the second grade but that didn't happen

There are things you don't realize at the time.

My mom always regretted that decision as it put me a year behind in my graduation class from 75 to 76.

However, had I gone on to second grade, I'd have never met the person I wound up marrying in May of 9th grade in 1973. Our paths would have never crossed.

I have no idea what my life would have been to without her.

honestly, I can't even imagine.

[RedJoker]

Originally Posted by rmp

I like this topic. it makes you think

When I think about this topic, I come to the conclusion that most decisions don't really matter. For instance, I could say that where I chose to go to school, where I fell in love with the girl down the hall and got married was a turning point in life. But realistically, I likely would have gotten married to someone else, had I chose a different school. And I might have missed getting divorced, or maybe just gotten divorced for a different reason, etc.

Would my life have been drastically different or just have different details? I dunno. Does it matter?

[redcrow]

Has anyone read "Bringing Out the Dead" by Joe Connelly? I ask because his story is similar to mine about 30 years ago. I'd been a critical care respiratory therapist for 25 years in a badly broken health care system. Too many sets of vacant empty eyes after too many failed resuscitation efforts, too many people turned into plant food, intubated and placed on ventilators with absolutely no chance of regaining consciousness, too many crack babies and the broken bleeding debris of domestic violence ignored by LE.
It's a profession that'll eat you alive if you care at all.

By 1996, I didn't care... Then through a series of incredibly serendipitous circumstances, I made a leap of faith based on previously acquired computer skills to become a systems administrator at NASA. Spent the next year, with my head down, teaching myself the skills needed to manage large scale, distributed UNIX systems, scared that someone would discover exactly how weak my technical background was. But by 1997, I was more comfortable and had earned the respect of my peers. I'll never forget the manager, Scott Zimmer, who hired me. I was completely truthful with him about my lack of experience, but he gave me a chance anyway. At the end of my first year, he gave me a huge raise that made it possible for my handicapped wife to retire.

That career change made all the difference in the world. I got help for my drinking and depression. My health improved dramatically and perhaps most importantly, I rediscovered the magic we call music. We're comfortably and happily retired now in a part of the country we dearly love.

[JackC1]

3 events:

1. Marriage
2. Kids
3. Motorcycle

[hubcapsc]

Originally Posted by redcrow

It's a profession that'll eat you alive if you care at all.

I'll bet. We're all indebted to people who choose to work in that field.

Your second choice was probably a lot of fun, though



-Mike

[fitness1]

I realized last time I started this thread I never gave any of my own personal stories...here goes:

Summer I was 13 - riding motocross in mid-air over a jump and the shock rings gave way on my front wheel. I'm 5 feet off the ground doing 45 mph with my front wheel dangling from the cable. Woke up in the ER with the doc telling any more pressure on my sternum and I was toast. That's when I took up tennis after riding since i was about 5.

Summer I was 15. My best bud in high school invited me up to a cabin on a lake that his parent's friends had allowed them to use. There was a rowboat and a small older ski boat. My buddy decided we could handle taking the ski boat out without a spotter. I was reluctant, but trying to be "tough" at 15. We go out - I'm slowly feeding the line and trying to keep straight in the water. When I "hit it" that wasn't the case and I did a semi-circle and just missed the dock and Steve. He was the most popular guy in school and the best athlete. Being a complete idiot (I knew better) almost cost him his life and me being the guy that killed or maimed him.

19 years old. I was out of town visiting a friend I was driving and it was POURING rain and night. There was a "no left turn" sign (unlit) at a corner in a place where it was impossible to see. I made the turn in a safe fashion, but apparently it was a hot spot for tickets and we got nailed. My friend lived about a block from the intersection so I just pulled into the driveway when the lights came on. At which point my buddy tells me he has a large amount of contraband on him. While i was trying to explain to the cop I was from out of town and couldnt have possibly seen the sign, my buddy told him this was his house and he had to go to the bathroom and he was allowed to go. Obviously this could have gone south quickly.

Age 25 - working the late shift at the record store. I start counting out the till an hour or so before closing - it was just after Christmas and there was a lot of dough in the store, but I "downloaded" it into a secret spot in the office every hour or so. Standing there counting and talking to one of my workers and a guy comes through the door with a double barrel sawed off shotgun and sticks it in my face. He's young, definitely hopped up and shaking. I did my best to stay calm and put 125.00 into a bag and hand it to him (all that was in the till at the time) I managed to keep my head attached to my body and push the alarm after his exit. Funny thing - that morning I got a call from the guy who owned the health club I was training at asking me if I had ever considered coming to work for him. Decision made - and that was the beginning of a long run in the fitness business

Summer I was 31 I was training clients on the side while working part time in a high end audio store. The audio gig wasn't going well and I decided I wanted to take some time off. I was considering a move to Boone NC as there was a fitness center being added on to a tennis club down there. I had some interaction with the owner, but nothing solid. I had been done with the audio job for a few weeks and was traveling to music festivals etc and just having some fun. A friend of mine and I were going to do some sport climbing at an escarpment a couple hours away and it rained so we decided not to go. I was living 25 miles from my current city and he lived here. He said "why don't you come up here and we'll get a workout in at the Community Center and go to lunch. When I walked into the lobby of this building I'd never been in before, a woman who I still swear I've never met before (she claimed we'd met at a seminar in Chicago) walked up and said "it's so good to see you - you aren't looking for a job are you? Three days later I was working there, and I just went by 30 years of training people here - I can't imagine what my life would have been like if this chance meeting hadn't happened. It also affected my parents lives a they moved up here after my brother passed and spent their last 15 years here.

Phases and stages....

[zuzu]

I think it's likely we all have a few "life turning points", acknowledged or no. But the one that comes most readily to my mind prefaced pretty much all of the subsequent ones. I was 18 turning 19 and got into a fight in my little hometown and was remanded to "home supervision" (I couldn't go anywhere for 30 days). I was not formally charged, because all my mates were tight-lipped ("I didn't see a thing"), but "if the subject declines this offer the investigation will continue." So I turned 19 essentially under house arrest.

So there I was, no internet in the '70's, 3 channels of TV, a radio, and a rotary phone, which I could barely touch with 4 sisters at home. I became very bored. So bored that I finally dug my mom's guitar out from under the bed, opened the Mel Bay book that was in the case, and learned some chords. I got a Harmony H16 Bobkat for my 7th birthday, during the 1964 Beatlemania craze, which I had barely touched. When the 30 days were done I retrieved it from the cousin I had loaned it to and started trying to learn in earnest. It had a string begin to buzz after a couple of days, I was clueless, and my cousin wasn't home, so I called a fellow I remembered from school that played guitar. He said come on over and got me straight with the string buzz, and he became my musical mentor and close friend. 2 months later I was gigging bass, not guitar, for money, and as I "grew up" in the local music scene I came to find that my friend was one of the best, and most respected, young guitarists in the area. We played together for the next 5 years, by which time I was a solid semi-pro musician with a busy gigging schedule.

From the time we started playing together almost my entire social life was from playing music. My 2 oldest and best friends come from it, it's how I met my wife, had children and grandchildren, and how I came to know Jesus. And if I hadn't been forced to stay home for my "crime" (I was kinda wild), I never would have bothered with music.

So, as a teenager I was drinking too much one night, did a bad thing, essentially got away with it, but the consequences of it shape the arch of my life to this very day. Of course I know all this, but to write it out like a story is very thought provoking. Kind of amazing, when I think about it.

[Slothead56]

This is an interesting thread and really has me thinking…

If you take away the devestating high school incident with my Father, my discovery of writing and performing in college, the career path that ultimately found me, the high probability of death driving the backroads of Vermont at reckless speed on icy roads one stupid December night and the near fatal skiing accident I had 12 years ago, I have to say it was my divorce.

Not because of the divorce itself (from a good woman that I married too young) but due to my unending effort to fight the system and share custody of my son.

After several years of battling courts and attorneys and passing on numerous promotions that would have advanced my career but required relocation, I found a niche spot in my Company headquarters (local) and carved out a very nice career. There were plenty of promotions along the way as I took a different tack from my peer group and zero regrets. But, had I not gone the route of wanting to be a full time Dad at any cost I would not have met my current (and last) wife at work.

We developed a strong friendship which grew into a passionate life affirming love. A couple kids, a bunch of dogs, couple mortgages and countless friends and adventures would not have happened with this woman by my side had I not “given it up to gain it back”.

It hasn’t always been easy but I thoughtfully believe it was that decision to fight and negotiate that has made the biggest impact on my life.

I’m happily retired and thankful everyday. Really fortunate guy….

[rllink]

Lowest point in my life, High School. Luckily things went up from there. They couldn't have gotten worse. Highest point, graduating from said high school and leaving town.

Biggest life change, when I got my draft notice and had two months to decide whether I was going to go ahead and get drafted for two years or join another branch and disrupt my life for four years. I chose the Navy. It completely changed my direction in life.

Greatest accomplishment, graduating from college on the GI Bill. I was the first in my family to ever to graduate from college.

So there you go.

[The Bard Rocks]

A few...

Age 14, beginning of the Big Folk Scare - I attended a church camp where all other kids gathered around and sang folk songs for fun. l loved it and determined to learn to play guitar so I could add something to such activities. Which brought me to today.

Age 18, just entered college. And joined the Outing Club because I hoped to find someone to ice skate with. The OC was central to my life through grad school and beyond and the activities I learned to do are still ones I enjoy 60 years later. I run the OC alumni group. Just put out a newsletter today.

1980 - having sold a farm and bought another, I had a year or two before my income would start again, so I took a job selling farms (like "real estate agent", only specialized). which I am still doing. Turns out I missed people. And I still like animals.

The same year, I married, the right person this time. A college friend, she came to work for me to take a break from her "real" job - and stayed. It has been good. And a "his", "hers' and "ours" came from it, all loved equally by both of us.

1986 -still dairy farming, I wrangled days off to fly to New Mexico and photograph and survey in a new cave find there. It changed my life and developed over the years into perhaps the most astounding wild cave in the world. I was so fortunate to have spent years there, starting right at the beginning. Working there on time off from the farm introduced me to many of my best friends. The rest of them come from my OC days and through music.

Although there were plenty of times when i might have disagreed; now with the perspective of years, I realize: life has blessed me.

[jp2558]

Several of my life events involve evidence of guardian angels, saving my ***** more than once. I can't prove the existence of a diety but I can't deny the existence of guardian angels.