Funny cat stories

[tinnitus]

This is/was Sam, in Bonsall, CA, when I lived there for a while last century. Cool dude, inside/outside, he came and went as he pleased. Not aloof at all, he'd roll onto his back to offer up the softest belly for rubbing with a bare foot - no teeth, no claws, just loud purring.

One day, he was coming up the street as I walked down to the mailbox. I said, "Hi Sam," and he replied loudly and clearly, "Zang!"

I said, "WHAT???" and he said "Zing!"

Wondering if that cinnamon candy I ate at a Dead concert in 73 had come back to haunt me, I sat down right there to see what else he had to share. Stroking his cheek, I asked him to repeat himself and he said, "Zang" again. Then he opened his mouth, wide, to reveal a huge dragonfly buzzing its wings loudly and trying to escape. Sounded just like Peter Frampton or Joe Walsh on one of those talk box things.

The insect saw his chance and fled, presumably to go warn his dragonfly buddies about that orange cat on the hill.

[catndahats]

Great story and picture Tinnitus!
Thanks.

[RJVB]

I have 2 middle-aged cats (brother and half-sister) who are quite normal as far as cats go, and an almost 3yo little all-white female, born from the colony of white cats that lived in my neighbourhood and saved from a water drain in the alley next to me (then new) house when she was barely a month old. She has a few weird quirks that are probably related to having been raised by me, like insisting on eating her (official!) meals at the table like us. For a while she'd eat only from my lap; nowadays she'll stand on her own chair with her front paws on the table. She's the only cat that has no interest in milk. She'll also make scraping movements (as if to cover her excrements) when she smells something she apparently doesn't like. She's also the most talkative cat I've ever known, and the only one who'll actually come to me for protection (e.g. at the vet or when she accompanies us to my mother in law's).

I took her to the vet when I estimated here to be 3 months old (she was at least half a month younger). I put her cage on the counter to set up her file with the assistant. When asked I gave her name, and she produced a nice mrrraow as if to say "yes, that's me".
She actually just did the same thing (she's been lying rolled up next to me), and I swear I didn't think out loud!

[Pura Vida]

We have always been a cat family. In my adult years, we've owned eight cats (four currently, four who've passed away). The first generation had some interesting mannerisms. Several of our cats love to play fetch, but none like our first cat, who would bring us a foam ball every evening and chase it down our apartment hallway for 30 minutes.

When we moved into our first home, the basement had cheap acoustic tiles, but the laundry room ceiling was open. Our second cat found an access point, so she could climb throughout the house on top of those ceiling tiles. The first time she did this, she freaked me out b/c I felt eyes on me in the laundry room, LOL.

My all-time favorite pet was our black cat, named Boo. He was very friendly and super chill, both with us and with any visitors. Each night, he would escort my young kids up to their room, as they went to bed. In the second half of his life, we moved into our current home, where we renovated our backyard. Boo was always an indoor cat, but in our new home, he loved going into the backyard. He was declawed (no judgement; it was acceptable in 2002), so there was no chance of him escaping our fenced yard. He would walk around the yard, checking out the garden and pool area before settling beside us on lounge chairs, patio furniture beside the fire pit, or on an empty chair in the covered patio. At night, he would climb into bed with me and lay beside my chest until I fell asleep. He lived 17 years, and there will never be another cat like him.

The new generation are 5yo and 3yo siblings. The older ones are smaller and more nervous, especially the femaie. The two 3yo are part Siamese and about 20lbs each. Super laid back boys. The one cat is a lot like my Boo, in terms of being social and arguably more curious than any other cat we've owned. Each pet has their own personality, which makes owning them so enjoyable.

[tinnitus]

I never knew cats to fetch until I was stationed on a US warship in Sasebo Japan last century.

I knew an American couple there who'd invite me to stay every weekend on the fold-out couch/bed in their apartment. It was a real treat to sprawl on a regular size bed, one in which I could actually sit up, as opposed to a standard Navy shipboard "rack" (about 3/4 the size of a twin bed with a flimsy curtain for "privacy"), stacked three high like bunks in a cramped berthing area. But I digress.

My friends had an adorable toddler daughter who was learning to walk and talk. What a sweetie. And a really cool cat named Shivers.

We'd all sit around evenings and talk about home while I threw foam rubber golf balls for Shivers to fetch and return to me. Fascinated by each other, I was far more interactive with him than his "parents" who were used to his antics, so I got all the fetching action.

Eventually, I'd crash for the night and wake up the next morning with a cat sitting on my chest staring intently at me, noses just inches apart. Between us was a pile of all five of his foam balls, ready to throw. What a nice touch of humanity in a place where I'd normally be sleeping on an all-metal ship with several dozen co-workers/strangers.

Fine cat.

[RJVB]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CfRxwSroytI

[Horsehockey]

In my youth I had a job assisting old people. One of my clients was an ancient European immigrant Big band violinist who lived in a small hovel of an apartment in Minneapolis. Henry taught his cat how to turn the bedside light on and off. And yes, that cat would do it upon command. I saw it with my own two eyes.

[Pura Vida]

I forgot to mention that Boo could open doors. One of our houses had square door handles, and one year, we were throwing a holiday party. We had the cats in a spare bedroom with a "Private Party: Keep Door Closed" sign. The cats kept escaping, and I decided to see who was opening the door to let them out, when I realized it was my big, black Boo cat. The next two houses all had curved handles, so he couldn't grab them, although not for a lack of trying! He sure was a smart kitty.

The other cat, not mentioned up to this point, was a beautiful Siamese, named Alex, who was my wife's baby. When we first moved into this house, I was home alone one evening (this was pre-kids). We had this small bubbling pond by the front door with a roller screen door. These doors have some slack at the bottom, and while I was reading, a frog appeared between the door and the pond. Alex dives head-first under the screen door into the front courtyard and grabs this frog into his mouth. He's choking on this frog and eventually spits it out, but the frog is missing a leg, which is either in my pond or in my cat's mouth. I pull him inside and close the front door. Alex begins to froth green foam, and all I can think is that my wife's baby cat is going to die on my watch, thanks to this frog. I grab the water bowl and rinse his mouth (and half of his face) with water. After a few minutes, the frothing subsides, and he disappears into the kitchen. He lived another 14+ years, so I think he was ok, but he sure scared me that night.

[RJVB]

Cats are (can be) highly intelligent, in a different way than dogs, but probably more intelligent. They're individual hunters, so they have to figure things out by themselves and once they put their minds to something they can really keep trying until they succeed. This makes them known escape artists, for instance. Having something almost opposing thumbs doesn't hurt them either.
(Dogs OTOH have more social intelligence, and learned this super-intelligent trick to "ask the human". But come to think of it, my cats are very good at that too.)

Thankfully my cats aren't so intelligent that they have learned how to open doors, but 2 of the 3 have figured out how to bypass the catdoor that gives them access to the upstairs when it's closed.

They've also all learned the word "descend" (down the stairs, from the table; my cute white queenie will obey under plaintive protest ^^). And the 2 older cats somehow learned that they can go onto the bed only when it's closed and covered with a plaid. In the previous house the male would actually ask me to prepare the bed so he could go on.

Originally Posted by Pura Vida

Alex begins to froth green foam, and all I can think is that my wife's baby cat is going to die on my watch, thanks to this frog.

You have too much "nature that wants you dead" over there in the US, but here in Europe I'd say your frog was actually a toad

We have those over here too, and sometime last year a baby somehow got into the house, just slightly over 1 cm long. The 3 cats were all very interested, but from a distance, even the big male who is an avid fly and spider hunter.

Which reminds me: he'll come running when I call him with a special, urgent voice when there are flies to catch, and he'll help me hunt when he sees me taking out something to swat flies out of the air with, or make spiders descend from the ceiling.

Of course all of the cat stuff above under the caveat emptor "when I feel like it". We used to joke that our dog wanted to be a cat when she behaved like that when young (not so much a joke anymore now that she's an adult).

[Bob Womack]

One cat I mentioned before, Oreo, always welcomed a lap to sit in and always came into my home studio for my sessions. If I closed the studio door he'd chirp to get my attention while reaching underneath and playfully grabbing around for me. He loved to curl up in my guitar cases while I played. Every morning before I got out of bed he liked to climb on my chest and take about thirty seconds to get his cheeks rubbed and ears scratched. Every night at my bedtime he'd come out onto the second-floor landing in the living room and call to me to come up. Then when I got in bed he'd come for another rub and stay snuggled up beside me until I fell asleep. I never had to worry about cold feet when I slept - he seemed to naturally gravitate to my feet and snuggle up to them.

We bought a queen-sized inflatable mattress to sleep on in our living room when we had guests. The morning after that first night of sleeping on it we propped it up against the open-plan stairs to the second floor in the living room, to get it out of the way. Oreo stuck his head over the landing and took a look to see what the commotion was. "Ah!" says he. "Look what they've brought me!" With a twinkle in his eye he jumped through the banister and hooked one claw in the front face of the mattress. With a hearty "Heave-Ho!" he surfed down to the first floor with a ripping sound, opening it up in a straight line as if with a zipper. Then he walked off casually as the mattress collapsed into a heap behind him with a sigh. I could practically hear his thoughts: "It's what these things are made for, isn't it?" $45 down the drain in two seconds. All any of us could do is collapse in a fit of laughter.

Oh, and he loved to sit in the balloon header of the drapes under the stairs and survey his kingdom.

Bob

[hubcapsc]

[Silly Moustache]

Hi, I still mis Rupert a great deal.

He was the fifth cat that we rehomed from various charities etc.

He was a Burmese and a "Savannah" another term for a Serval from Sub Saharan Africa.
He was about 12lbs in weight and four foot long when stretched out - which he tended to do quite a lot.

He did not "meow" like "normal" cats, he had a howl which many found frightening, and had teeth and claws that looked wicked but he never raised a paw to us, or any other critter. His face was downright "satanic" but he was mild mannered.

I believe he was mistreated / and/or misunderstood in his first home, as he was frightened og a hand raised to stroke him.
I regarded him as "autistic" as He could not cope with moved furniture, or his bowl six inches away from normal.
He was very precise in his daily timetable.

He had a cat bed in my bedroom which he used in the evening until 9.45 when we were sitting to watch the News at Ten and we'd hear him galumphing down stairs like an old man!

One thing that really affects me at present : one of my late night foibles was to switch off the TV, take my meds and pick up one of my smaller guitars for a late night finger-pick.

Whether he was with me, eating, or outside, he'd quietly come and sit beside me while I played.

I miss that, and my late night noodling has diminished considerably - it just isn't the same.

[catndahats]

These stories are fascinating and delightful---thanks all!
Bob, your Oreo looks like a new feral cat that's hanging around lately. I am trying not to give him a name, kinda hope he roams elsewhere, but I am convinced that there is a signed painted with invisible paint on the front of our house that strays can read and it says something like, "Stray cats welcome here, free food." If he stays, I'll have to get him to the vet for a neutering....we have a big feral cat explosion in our county.

Andy, your Rupert story inspired my thread. It's interesting how attached we get to these unique and independent critters. I try to act like I don't care, but if one of the cats doesn't show up around feeding time, I start calling and searching right away.

Another funny I was reminded of this morning. Our female "Little Bit" is our alarm clock. These cats have an uncanny knack for telling time. If I don't wake up early enough (when she gets hungry) she climbs up on the roof and sits at our bedroom window, tapping with her paw demanding attention and meowing until we come down and feed her. It's amazing how she knows which room we are in. By the time I get downstairs she will be sitting at the door smiling.

My wife told me yesterday that they also know our truck. She was out the other day and saw one of the cats down on the corner. When the cat saw our truck coming, he chased her home. She said he had a guilty look on his face, like he knew he was not supposed to be down there...just like a kid with his hand in the cookie jar.

[rdeane]

Pura Vida's post about Alex and the frog made me laugh and reminded me of my cat Bubba (passed now for 7 years). He was a Siamese with crossed eyes but was a surprisingly good hunter. He was so lovable but not the brightest bulb in the box. Every year from kittenhood he would stalk and catch a toad, only to spit it out when it exuded whatever toads do when threatened. He would spend the next half hour spitting and sputtering and never let us get close to him in his misery. Sad to say, while it was so unpleasant for him it was hilarious. He could just never remember from year to year that toads tasted horrible.

He was also terrified of ceiling fans. Here in the South we use them frequently. He lived happily with the operating fan most of the time. But every so often he would forget it was on the ceiling, look up and freak out. He never did come to terms with that contraption. My oh my how i miss that cat!

[Gitfiddlemann]

One of my cats is.....


a vampire!
His litter mate never suspected.