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#16
08-07-2022, 02:49 PM
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That boy's so dumb he'd sell his car for gas money.
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#18
08-07-2022, 03:21 PM
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Sometimes attributed to Mark Twain, but actual source probably unknown:
"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years." 
__________________
"Music is much too important to be left to professionals."
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#19
08-07-2022, 04:02 PM
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A sad day at the circus as the human cannon ball died. A spokesperson for the circus said it would be very hard to find a man of his caliber to replace him with.
__________________
PS. I love guitars!
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#20
08-07-2022, 04:26 PM
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Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
They taste funny!
__________________
Call me Scott Cole Clark Angel 2 Thin Line | Emerald X7 Custom Woody | IRIS DF in sinker mahogany Methos1979: (Almost) Every guitar-related review I've written on AGF! Scott & Donna Music
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#21
08-07-2022, 05:31 PM
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Guy walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder and says
"This is my pet, I call him Tiny" Barman:- "Do you call him Tiny because he is so small?" Man: - "No - I call him Tiny because he's my newt".
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#23
08-07-2022, 06:33 PM
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__________________
PS. I love guitars!
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#24
08-07-2022, 06:45 PM
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Years ago in South Carolina The University of SC played Clemson University on what was known as "Big Thursday". An annual football game that usually takes place these days just before or right around Thanksgiving. Anyway...my Dad and his best running buddy were headed up to the game in Columbia, SC on Tuesday ...to return on Sunday. Probably enough said but it gets better. So these two guys (life long friends) are riding up the road to Columbia and need to take a "rest stop". So my Dad's friend Buster (yeah...that was his nickname) went into a little country store to relieve himself as they'd been swilling bourbon along the way and my old man goes in next. Much later he told me he really felt bad cause all they did was use the man's restroom and hit his water cooler for a long cold drink. So the old man asks the proprietor "how's business"? The old man says: Son...business is just like you see it. I'm trading ice water for piss and selling 4 cent stamps at cost"!
One of my favorite "Dad Stories"...been gone since 1998 and I miss him every day.
__________________
Jim Dogs Welcome......People Tolerated!
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#26
08-08-2022, 06:35 AM
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I'm the dad. I wear the pants in the family. And everyone makes fun of me.
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#27
08-08-2022, 06:36 AM
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The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop and says “Make me one with everything”.
__________________
Please note: higher than average likelihood that any post by me is going to lean heavily on sarcasm. Just so we’re clear...
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#29
08-08-2022, 07:12 AM
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2 cows are grazing in a field. One says to the other, “are you worried about mad cow disease?”
Why would I care, I’m a helicopter.
__________________
LarryK. AGF Moderator
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#30
08-08-2022, 07:42 AM
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I was going to tell a joke about time travel, but you didn't like it.
__________________
Waterloo WL-S, K & K mini Waterloo WL-S Deluxe, K & K mini Iris OG, 12 fret, slot head, K & K mini Follow The Yellow Brick Road
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