"Dude, I HATE that song!"

[tinnitus]

This thread is not intended to be as negative as the title might imply. I just want to learn how others here deal diplomatically with something I've seen handled in dozens of ways, good and bad, for decades.

The subject here revolves around acceptance or rejection of tunes (usually covers) suggested by fellow musicians (band-mates, duo partners or informal jam buddies). I've arrived at various gentle/brutal, nice/not-so-nice ways to do this, some that I can share if/when this thread comes to life.

- If you agree with everything your musical counterparts bring to the table, you're blessed.

- Maybe you dislike everything they want to do? Time, IMHO, to move on.

- Or perhaps they're stuck on a good song but play/sing it horribly (and there's no real tactful/realistic way to nudge that one in the right direction).

- An awkward one for me is when someone tells me how much they love a tune and what a profound inspiration it is. But, for whatever reason, it has always annoyed me - like fingernails on a chalkboard - and I really, really don't want to participate in playing it, anywhere, ever.

Let's share some techniques here and maybe some profound anecdotes. This is entirely subjective, so keep it fun.

"Dude, I HATE that song!"

[frankmcr]

I've been tempted to post that sort of comment, here and in other forums, and am rather proud of myself for not doing so, even when a really eloquent version is all typed out and proofread and awaiting only a click on the "Submit" button.

If a particular song that I despise gives people pleasure, well heck. I'm not gonna interfere.

[Mr. Jelly]

The whole band/people thing got to be more than I wanted to deal with a long time ago. It was a strong reason I switched to fingerpicking as I looked at it as I could play enough of the band stuff to satisfy my desires. It's worked out. Now if someone wants to play with me, I can deal with that. I shy away from backing most people up now days. My desire to perform in front of people is not that great.

[mr. beaumont]

I've played tunes I don't like with a good live band, and it was a BLAST.

Good players, good arrangement, crowd digs it...that can make almost anything fun.

So basically,I'll give anything a chance...but if I'm not playing with good players, I'm out. I never want to be the best musician in the band.

Luckily, that's not so difficult

[rokdog49]

I’m not that picky or critical. In our duet we play a lot of different stuff.
It all has a place. I’m just glad I can still be doing it.

[ewalling]

Originally Posted by rokdog49

I’m not that picky or critical. In our duet we play a lot of different stuff.
It all has a place. I’m just glad I can still be doing it.

This is me, too, but perhaps that's because I rarely play with other people. When I do, I'm happy to play almost anything. It's fun just to play and put something together with someone.

[Rumblefish]

Originally Posted by mr. beaumont

I've played tunes I don't like with a good live band, and it was a BLAST.

Good players, good arrangement, crowd digs it...that can make almost anything fun.

So basically,I'll give anything a chance...but if I'm not playing with good players, I'm out. I never want to be the best musician in the band.

Luckily, that's not so difficult

This, right here. Some songs that I can’t stand to listen to are just a blast to play.
I try to keep an open mind. If you find yourself in a situation where you don’t like the majority of the songs, then you’re probably in the wrong situation.

[gfirob]

I think the eclectic nature of the songs our band does is one of its strengths and that comes from each player picking the song he sings on, and we all sing. One guy does all his own originals, one guy does 50's rockabilly and early country, one guy does 70's and 80's rock, one guy does any god**** thing. It is a pretty interesting play list which never gets stale and everybody is pretty open to anything. If there is some song I am not crazy about, I just do my best to play along knowing that they will do that for me.

[rllink]

I run into it a lot in bluegrass. I really like the music and I like the playing with other people playing on different instruments but I don't always like the message in some of the lyrics. But I just figure both the good and the bad comes with the territory. If I want to play bluegrass I have to play it.

[rmp]

Anyone should be able to take a good song and make it work for what "They" can do with it. If it's a good song, one guy with a guitar/piano and a mic can make it work.


The mistake is when the expectations of the members suggesting the song vastly exceed the bands ability or personnel to cover a song when the plan is to make it sound "Exactly like" the original.

For me, that's when this goes south.

Change it up, rearrange it, do a remake, NO problem. Been doing that with great success for a long time


oh! and then there's Mustang Sally....

[EZYPIKINS]

I had to play songs I didn't like for years. I think I learned allot from that.

That said, just because you like a song doesn't mean you do it justice.

There is no sense in doing anything, you don't do well.

[Glennwillow]

"Dude, I HATE that song!"

I have mostly been a solo artist when I have played in public. So for me, this issue has never been a problem. If I don't like a song, I just plain don't do it.

- Glenn

[H165]

"Dude, I HATE that song!"

I only get to this point when someone wants to play the same dang tune 2,000 times in a row over a few years of jam sessions.

There is one exception though ... MacArthur Park. I get to this point when someone wants to play the same dang tune 1 time in a row over a few minutes of any musical event (including turning on the radio)

[Mandobart]

Originally Posted by Mr. Jelly

The whole band/people thing got to be more than I wanted to deal with a long time ago......... I shy away from backing most people up now days. My desire to perform in front of people is not that great.

Exactly how I feel. I'd much rather play with people than play for people.

When I used to gig it was mostly solo partly because I just won't play songs I don't like (for a lot of reasons).

I go to several weekly jams and sure I don't love every song we play. But I do enjoy the social and musical interaction. I'm sure some of the other players don't love every song I call either.

It was kinda funny at a Wintergrass jam last month though. We were picking some bluegrass and John Prine songs. A woman joined us who was a decent singer and picker. When it came her turn to call the tune she said "Wagon Wheel". The rest of us answered "No" pretty emphatically in unison and then she got pretty apologetic about even suggesting it. I tried to assure her it was ok, no hard feelings, but it's become the "Brown Eyed Stairway to Mustang Alabama" of bluegrass/newgrass/Americana jams.

[Mr. Jelly]

Originally Posted by Mandobart

"Brown Eyed Stairway to Mustang Alabama" .

You know I'm stealing this line from you, don't you? LOL