Retirement after the Hero's Journey

[Skarsaune]

Interesting read, for sure.

I'm 5-10 years out from retirement, but I've begun the transition to serving others by teaching part time, both guitar (privately) and technical subjects at the community college. Donating instruments to music programs, doing small good things for others just because I can. It's a pretty good feeling.

I realized a while ago that I didn't care to advance further in my career; at this point, I'm comfortable and suited to being a senior engineer. I'd rather do the work than be the boss.

Similarly, I'll never be a music star. But I can share music and joy with others, both through teaching and performance. Another pretty good feeling.

[islandguitar]

Thanks for the article, Glenn!

My gateway to (early) retirement came at age 59 when I was let go via politics (new VP staking his ground eliminated my position) and had to "claw" my way from 59 to 62 (Social Security) and then to 65 (Medicare) and stitch together various non professional jobs in order to "make it". Fortunately, my wife and I had staked out our main goal from which all other activities would flow.....to "live where we vacation"! And, that turned out to be this lovely island here in Rode Island (with two incomes!).

23 years ago you could financially land here, and we've been eternally grateful to have made that move. It provided the "anchor" to a lot of the uncertainty of losing a job and making a go of a new adventure. If you talk with my wife she'll tell you it wasn't luck it's because we worked our *** off to make it happen! LOL! She's right!

Still, I found it difficult to actually say I was retired when folks would ask about me. I literally had a tough time saying "I'm retired"! Much easier to let folks know I am an educational consultant (I am, counseling/ college admissions), and fill from there, as I did with interesting part-time work. For me, as with others out there, there was no "ritual" for beginning retirement, it was "ok, what do I do now?"

Of course these many years later (I'm 74), I can say that all worked out well......and it feels like a very good balance of family, part-time work, friends, guitar (of course) and our time of the water. I chose to avoid continuing my "call to adventure" with re-establishing my career later in life and took a different path to where we are today. And yes, I love retirement! LOL!

One of the guiding phrases in my life has been: "you can have anything you want, you just can't have everything you want". I've always tried to incorporate that into my thinking and planning from small to larger things. It helps prioritizing and planning and keeps you humble!

[Glennwillow]

Originally Posted by buddyhu

Interesting article. Thanks Glenn.

I was given a different model early in my career, one that posited a cycle that lasts about 6-10 year, and then repeats. There is a period where one is in a dark, fallow experience without a clear vision or goal. You can liken it to putting dough in a warm dark place to allow the yeast to work its magic. Then a bague sense of a goal or vision or purpose arises from that darkness, and begins to inspire action. And then as movement through the cycle continues, the vision or purpose becomes more clear and defined, and one feels inspired and excited and energized to actualize the vision. Then one achieves the goal and enjoys that for a while, and explores variations within that vision, until a change (perhaps internal, such as a shift to a different phase of life, perhaps external, such as a changing business environment or the end of an important relationship) triggers a sense of restlessness, of no longer feeling contented, or of “been there, done that”. Feelings that accompany this next part of the cycle, the “declining action” can include disappointment, disillusionment, a feeling of depression or loss, etc. Then one returns to the darkness of the fallow period, where there might be some withdrawal from others, and there may be a sense of letting go and of surrender, until the next goal,of vision arises.

This model has given more punctuation to my view of my life and development, and it has made it easier to tolerate the transition from valued professional to another ant in the ant farm. And it fosters a sense that another goal or vision is always just a few years away….which is very supportive when one feels lost or less valuable than when one was working and “moving up the ladder” financially and socially (not everyone has such an experience, of course, but many feel that the years of productivity and material accumulation supports a sense of succeeding and of making progress, and they like that).

I do think that life tends to go in cycles, though I never looked back to see how long they were. For me, probably shorter than 6-10 years, maybe 3-6 years for me.

My work was engineering work: product development, creating new stuff with new capabilities. I was never one to climb mountains, plant flags, survey my kingdom, etc. I enjoyed creating new stuff, just as I do in music. In fact, doing design work feels exactly the same as working on a creative music project. The good thing about making new products for the company I worked for was that the equipment we manufactured was helpful in cleaning up the environment.

I know I was still a cog in a wheel, but it was a much smaller wheel than I experienced in some of the large companies I worked for. If I had not found a way out of those bigger companies, I would have never, ever had a problem retiring.

I find some of the excitement I felt in my past job when I work on a music project in my retirement. When I have an interesting music project going, I am pretty much in heaven.

Originally Posted by dhalbert

...Many of my career experiences were on projects or products that were ultimately commercial failures or were prototypes that were shelved and not used. Four years ago, at age 60, I grew tired of this, and was wondering about retiring early. I then made a change to a new organization where I am now working on something that is highly successful, and where I have constant interaction with and feedback from a community of actual end users. The psychological difference is tremendous. If this job were to go away, I think it would be difficult to find something as motivating. I can see ramping down as I age to part-time work, but doing the same thing...

Yes, this is very much like what I experienced. I can very much identify. When you have been lucky enough to be involved in something where you feel you have actually made a meaningful contribution to making the world a better place, you really don't want to lose that feeling.

I had a hard time driving away from my company on my last day before retirement from full-time work.

- Glenn

[Slothead56]

Interesting article. I’m closing in on 6 months til i retire at 65.5. I’ve had a very meaningful career in consumer products and feel like I’ve contributed to the businesses and people development, either through direct management or mentoring, greatly. But retirement kind of snuck up on me.

I had the last of my three kids at age 40 so the 20 years leading up to age 60 was a blur of personal fulfillment (family first) and work accomplishments. I choose to not go as hard on career advancement as I could because it would have required time sacrifices I wasn’t willing to make.

I sometimes wonder how far I could have gone, especially looking at my work contemporaries and what they achieved. But at the end of the day I have no regrets and in fact think my “hero journey” was defined by not striving for more leadership accomplishment. Only now am I truly recognizing that life success is a much greater goal than professional success.

I’m excited for the future and looking forward to the freedom that “time that is mine” will give me.

[renoslim]

"Adventure before Dementia" ... I love it.

Been retired about 5 years now.. been pretty exciting but not always in a good way . (Health). Still some issues but much better now. One saying I have been rolling over in my mind is from the film Shawshank Redemption. It helps me to have more energy and to be more open to new things..

"Get busy living or get busy dying"

Lee

[Photojeep]

Very interesting article.

I retired, officially, on June 30 of this year. I physically left on May 19 - higher education is a strange beast when it comes to the timing of things like retirement ...

In these recent months I've discovered the following:

I'm missing work less and less. Actually, I'm not missing the work part at all, just the people I worked with. I moved about 500 miles away so "dropping in" isn't really an option.

I will be teaching one class this Spring and it should prove interesting doing so without being "the one in charge" (I used to be the Department Chair.) Since I'm teaching this class remotely I think it will help, but I'm a little apprehensive about it. I expect it to be both familiar and new all at once.

I'm now happy to do little things I never gave much thought to before retiring. I've actually cleaned out my garage 3 times since May 19th! It probably didn't need cleaning but it felt good to do it. Taking my car to the carwash is something I now look forward to. I can't remember feeling that when I was working.

Once I finished the list of "things I need to get done" I found myself a little lost. I bought all the things I wanted to buy, fixed all the things that needed fixing, and sold what I kept putting off selling. It's a strange combination of accomplishment and suspense.

I'm far more patient than I can ever remember being.

My blood pressure is always in the healthy category!

I've started regularly exercising. Instead of waiting until the weekend to "cram it all in" I do some just about every day.

Two days ago I found I can no longer properly throw a football, and it was a very embarrassing moment. I used to be able to heave the pigskin at least 20-30 yards with a good spiral but on Sunday I couldn't throw it well to my son who was 30 feet away. I guess not throwing one for 25 years has taken its toll.

I think my point is that I'm at the beginning of this chapter of my life and it's taking a while to figure out. I'm in no real hurry to find out I want to do, but I'm also interested to learn what it will be.

It's an interesting time for sure.

Best,
PJ

[Slothead56]

Originally Posted by Photojeep

I think my point is that I'm at the beginning of this chapter of my life and it's taking a while to figure out. I'm in no real hurry to find out I want to do, but I'm also interested to learn what it will be.
PJ

This is an interesting perspective to me. At the beginning of my career I wasn’t really sure what I wanted it to be. It took some time to understand my wants and where fulfillment was. It was a chapter much as you’ve described figuring out the “next chapter” of retirement.

Thanks for sharing!

[srick]

Originally Posted by Photojeep

I think my point is that I'm at the beginning of this chapter of my life and it's taking a while to figure out. I'm in no real hurry to find out I want to do, but I'm also interested to learn what it will be.

It's an interesting time for sure.

Best,
PJ

PJ - It does feel reminiscent of being five years old (yes, I do remember that year!) when everything was interesting: painting the stairs, cleaning the garage, and going to the car wash. Plus, I have time to ‘notice’ things like the maple branch that just turned color, or the last rose of the year finally blossomed.

One other unexpected benefit of retirement has been that I am in a frame of mind where I can just ‘listen’ to the music. I had lost that ability for many years as thoughts of work and responsibilities were always creeping in to ruin the moment.

“Interesting for sure.”

Rick

[Photojeep]

Slothead and SRick,

I would also add that this newfound "wonder" about the world is a very refreshing thing to me. I'm still the same person I was before I retired, but now appreciate things, mostly small things, far more.

I feel the same yet different and it's a fun place to be!

Best,
PJ

[TRose]

I appreciate the article and the perspective it shares.
Thanks.

[Glennwillow]

Originally Posted by TRose

I appreciate the article and the perspective it shares.
Thanks.

I'm glad you thought it was interesting.

I have noticed that here on the AGF, far and away most people who have discussed retirement have been very happy with the change. In other groups of people I have encountered, there are a higher percentage of folks who are sort of up in the air and dissatisfied. Maybe having the hobby of guitar playing is a big help.

I think using retirement time to offer our skills and experiences to others in volunteer work can be rewarding, though I have had a couple false starts in that realm.

- Glenn

[catdaddy]

Originally Posted by Glennwillow

I'm glad you thought it was interesting.

I have noticed that here on the AGF, far and away most people who have discussed retirement have been very happy with the change. In other groups of people I have encountered, there are a higher percentage of folks who are sort of up in the air and dissatisfied. Maybe having the hobby of guitar playing is a big help.

I think using retirement time to offer our skills and experiences to others in volunteer work can be rewarding, though I have had a couple false starts in that realm.

- Glenn

Good point about the guitar hobby being a positive factor! Being involved in music at any level is at the very least palliative and at its best inspirational.
I also completely agree with your assessment of the rewards of volunteer work. It's been a great source of satisfaction for me in retirement, enhancing a sense of community and self-worth.

[Mandobart]

Well, it's an op-ed piece, revealing one person's opinion and advice. One person who provides no insight on their own journey.

I feel most of you have provided me with infinitely better advice when I've posted questions about retirement here, providing actual real-life examples and personal experience.

I've read here from many to beware being defined by a career, and how difficult the transition to retirement can be for those who are a big deal at work. You may be the boss, or money guy, or expert problem solver at work. In retirement, you're just another grumpy old fart in line at Starbucks. So it's crucial to define yourself somehow beyond your job.

I've done a lot in my time in the USN, as an engineer, instructor, power plant operator, leader and team member. More important are my roles as a neighbor, friend, brother, son, uncle, husband and father. One fundamental truth of all these roles is I have never accomplished anything lasting or consequential completely alone - only when working with others have I achieved major goals. I'm not a hero, but I've known a few and together we've done pretty well.

[Photojeep]

Mandobart,
Well said!

Best,
PJ

[Glennwillow]

Originally Posted by Mandobart

... One fundamental truth of all these roles is I have never accomplished anything lasting or consequential completely alone - only when working with others have I achieved major goals. I'm not a hero, but I've known a few and together we've done pretty well.

Yes, very good point. None of us accomplish much of anything on our own. The really substantial goals are reached through inspiring a team to work together.

I would hardly consider myself to be a hero, either.

- Glenn