any advice on sobriety?

[chippygreen]

No advice to offer, but the faith of a stranger, human-to-human.

Rooting for you to have all the strength, courage and support you need as you go through this.

Getting there will be worth the fight - but more importantly know that you are worth it too.

[catfish]

12 steps and similar -- these are just a technique for quitting, you need a fundamental reason, an anchor. You should realize that when you are drunk it is not YOU but you turn into someone else and you move into a different world -- you want to get back being YOU and to live in this world.
It is an internal decision and requires a deep thinking and resoluteness, a strong will as well.

The environment and way of life are also very important. If you are able to change that, it will help immensely.

Good luck with your recovery!

[DownUpDave]

From someone who has been down this road twice I feel for you. I had to hit rock bottom both times, that just means you are so sick and tired of being sick and tired you are ready to do something about it.

First time I did it on my own, cold turkey. Second time through AA, it took one year and trying different meetings to find a place I felt comfortable with. Been sober 10 years and the only advice I will give is keep trying different programs until something sticks. Everyone is different.....but not really, you find that out in meetings and it is a relief, 12 step programs do work. Please take care of yourself, you are more loved then you realized

[harpspitfire]

no advice here, i dont even know what the 12 step is, but the friends that support and understand why you have a problem, are the ones to stay away from

[catdaddy]

I've been sober now for 35 years. I had an introspective "road to Damascus" moment at that time when I saw with clarity the extent to which drinking alcohol had put me at a distance from my true-self, and the people and things that I loved. For me, as it turned out, that was the only step that I needed to take to get sober. It was not an easy journey, but the vision of a new start to life gave me the will to persevere. I hope you will find your own path to sobriety with that insight to start to guide you.

[Raggamuffin]

https://www.dunklin.org/

[Jim Owen]

Good luck.

There are other avenues than the 12 steps, including some recent drugs that seem to reduce cravings. Discuss with your doctor?

Therapy may help.

I’ve been there, and wish you the best.

[Nyghthawk]

A good friend of mine was in a similar situation about a year ago. He ended up in the hospital with acute kidney failure and DND (nearly died). He has been clean and sober since then. Quit smoking too. Told me that once he kicked alcohol's tail tobacco was easy.

You got to want it bad. You have to think you're worth it.

Best wishes. Tough road.

PS I carry my dedication chip in my pocket every day. You can't read the Serenity Prayer anymore but I know it's there.

[Riverwolf]

Are you a veteran by chance?
They have some free centers to get you the first 30-60 days under your belt.

[Mr. Jelly]

No one can help you. In the end it's all up to you. You've heard it all and thought about all of it. Problem drinking is a life train wreck in slow motion. I'll guarantee one thing. You've never heard a previous problem drinker say he wished he'd never quit.

[Kerbie]

Wishing you well, Picker.

[Kh1967]

As someone who know and loves many alcoholics, I don’t know any that have stayed physically/emotionally sober without the 12 steps, rigorous honesty, and truly working the program. They may exist, I just have not encountered any.

I wish you the very best in finding your way. There is help available and you are not alone. Great on you for reaching out.

*Mods....please, leave this post open and here for the visibility and support of our fellow member.

[KevWind]

Originally Posted by Floridapicker

This post will be moved. but its time I put down the Booze. 12 steps dosent work for me any advice fellow pickers? sorry to even have to post this.

Yes I was in (more or less) a similar situation some 34 years ago yes the 12 step program did not work for me either, and understanding that has resulted in now having been sober ever since.
And I can tell you categorically and without reservation you can definitely stay physically and emotionally sober without being in a 12 step program, or any organized program. And contrary to the prototypical montra, you can do it on your own

Honestly.

BUT it definitely takes some "rigorous self honesty" And your understanding that and deciding "it's time I put down the booze" is the most important initial element. And is the right way to begin.

But understand it is only the beginning of a more involved process. Because as some have mentioned there are other life factors besides just quitting the alcohol, that you will need to come to terms with, that can and will affect your ability to stay sober.

While in fact everybodies situation is ultimately unique, there are a number of general factors that seem to often be in play. Problem drinkers are often simultaneously escaping dealing with other life problems and demons in their life (while sober) AND at the same time often use being stoned to dwell on and conjure up distorted perceptions of what their problems are, and who to blame.

It is these other factors and one's perceptions of them, in one's life that will need to be examined and re examined and addressed and changed (sober)
that will ultimately determine success.

Personally once I finally decided to quit ( totally) and that I no longer wanted to drink (Period),,,,
It was actually not that hard to simply not drink (regardless of where I was and who else was drinking)

BUT resolving the other issues in my life took years of hard work, brutal self honesty, and ongoing periodic reexamination, of my perceptions about life and truth. It took years to get more or less sorted out and headed down the right path and is a work in progress to this day.

You can do it if you are willing to look into all aspects of your life honestly.

[marty bradbury]

Still looking for the path myself,

[TaoMaas]

Lots of good advice. I would only add that if you happen to stumble along your road to recovery, don't see that as total failure and use it as an excuse to get off the path. Think of it as walking towards somewhere you really want to be. If you trip along the way, you wouldn't turn around and go home. You'd go right back to walking and remind yourself to watch where you step next time. It's a journey...and one worth taking.