Getting comfortable on stage; what's your secret?

[Tnfiddler]

Be READY to go onstage is the best advice I can give you. Make sure you’ve learned yours songs, both vocally and instrumentally and sing them several times prior to take the stage. I always build a set list on Amazon Prime music and that’s all I listen to, weeks before the gig. That way, I know every little thing there is to know about those songs. I sing to them every time they’re on, as well. I NEVER get nervous going onstage when there’s an audience there, however, I can’t stand to sing in a room when’s there’s only 2-3 people present. That’s when I feel transparent and that every little I do is being scrutinized.

[Laughingboy68]

I think it was about 1984 or 85. I joined a band that was gigging constantly and took over as their second guitarist and primary lead singer. After about a month we played our first gig - I was 16 or 17.

I remember my heart beating out of my chest as we started our first set. Two or three songs in, I was still terrified, but slowly I felt my heart rate start to come down. Eventually I settled in. Adrenalin can only drive you batty for so long.

I've never felt stage fright since. Desensitization eventually drives fear away.

Play a longer gig. Open mics never allow enough time to battle through the adrenalin rush.

[Scolaguitar]

These are all good tips and I totally relate to the OP. Last year I performed twice and froze both times at first. Performing is a whole other set of chops that, (to me,) is infinitely more difficult than learning to play an instrument.

[Robin, Wales]

Well, there have been some great answers and insights so far!

Playing solo is hard. I've played in a band and in support of others many times but have only just started my solo outings to open mic's. The first one I did was just a couple of week's ago. It was in a large theatre hall with a seated audience of about 80 - so quite an initiation!!!!

Of course I was nervous. But what helped me was that every time I have practiced I have thought about where I might play (local venues etc) and, at some point during my practice, I practiced as if I was at that venue giving a performance, visualising the audience in front of me. So when I got up on stage it was all sort of familiar. Of course, I had my songs wired off by heart, and I'd practiced playing through errors. I forgot a verse in one of my songs as I was coming up to it but just ran through the first verse again and no-one noticed! I had also practiced at home talking to the audience, and playing head up looking around the room. I'd practiced how I was going to ask the sound guy to mic' me (keeping everything simple and quick for them), and I'd even taken some pick honey for my pick just so it stayed put if my hands were got bit sweaty. And I practiced and played standing, which my wife said immediately gave the performance impact as all the acts before had sat down and played.

I was just fine up there on stage - and I'm sure that it was visualising the performance and "practicing to perform" at home that really helped me. I'll certainly use the technique again for my next open mic' outing next month.

[nbs2005]

Thanks all for the great advice. The euphoria I feel at about the halfway point is worth the effort and getting a handle on my initial fears. I like the comments about inhabiting the song and performance and the emphasis on that.

Here's a clip from a few months ago before we had to close down again for a bit (back open). Watching that clip always makes me smile. And yes, when Danny and Tom are available I call them up. Those guys make everyone sound good.

Thanks,
Jeff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3qqovIFHtY

[min7b5]

As someone that has played solo guitar a number of times to hundreds of people in a pin-drop theater I can share the two things that work for me. One -and maybe it goes without saying (but I didn't really get it myself until fairly late in the game) but; over prepare. Practice the tunes you plan to play way more than you think you should. And try to mimic the set and setting too -if you play on the couch every day and then suddenly find yourself sitting upright in a metal folding chair in front of a lot of people, unable to see the frets on your guitar because it’s dark and/or the lights are coming at you sideways.. things can go south quick.

Second. At the risk of sounding woo woo, for anyone that has every really practiced meditation, you know that you can’t really stop the monkey mind, but you can practice not actually getting in the car and going for a ride with every thought bubble you randomly generate. And one of the ways you do that is by redirecting your attention to a fulcrum or anchor, the most of common of which is just your breathing. Well, in music making, for me, the breath is the groove. Specifically, my foot. I just keep redirecting my attention back to the groove when the inevitable pre-frontal cortex onslaught happens and I start thinking things like, “ uh oh, what chord comes next?,” “my butt hurts in this chair,” “I can’t hear myself,” “I just missed a note and now everyone knows I’m a fraud..” -the list never ends. But I just keep coming back to the foot. Works for me.

[usb_chord]

Originally Posted by min7b5

As someone that has played solo guitar a few times to hundreds of people in a pin-drop theater I can share the two things that work for me. One -and maybe it goes without saying (but I didn't really get it until fairly late in the game myself) but; over prepare. Practice the tunes you plan to play way more than you think you should. And try to mimic the set and setting too - if you play on the couch every day and then suddenly find yourself sitting upright in metal folding chair in front of a lot of people unable to see the frets on you guitar because it’s dark and or the lights are coming at you sideways, things can go south quick.

Second. At the risk of sounding woo woo, for anyone that has every really practiced meditation you know that you can’t really stop the monkey mind, but you can practice not actually getting in the car and going for a ride by every thought bubble you randomly generate. And one of the ways you do that is by redirecting your attention to a fulcrum or an anchor, the most of common of which is just you breath. Well, in music making, for me, the breath is the groove. Specifically, my foot. I just keep focussing on my foot. When the inevitable pre-frontal cortex onslaught happens and I start thinking things like, “ uh oh, what chord comes next?,” “my butt hurts in this chair,” “I can’t hear myself,” “I just missed a note and now everyone knows I’m a fraud..” -the list never ends. But I just keep coming back to the foot/groove. Works for me.

Great stuff, Eric.

[CollingsPicker]

Originally Posted by Daddyo

Like all things, the more you do it the easier it gets. Not one single musician was ever cool and calm when they started out.

This. I was never nervous playing in bands. Solo however was different because moving from venue to venue, or room to room, it was always a different experience in a different room setting up differently and trying to get things tweaked. However, I spent 10 years playing one location years ago and that repetitive playing in the same familiar location allowed me to get extremely comfortable wherever I play. After decades, my nervousness is only until I get set up and playing. Once I know everything is working and sounding good, nervousness goes away. Once I get it clean soundcheck I am good to go.

[Oldguy64]

At an open mic, quite a few people are as nervous as you are.
Go as close to first as possible.
The nervous folk are busy being nervous.
The old pros are making sure they have their stuff squared away.
So, maybe a third of the audience is paying real attention to you.
So, sing that song about a broken heart to the prettiest girl in the room, like she’s the one that broke your heart.
Sing the love song to your significant other like they are the only one in the room.
Find someone that appears to match the personality of the song and sing it to them.

But being close to first also takes the pressure off you sooner.

[Skarsaune]

Originally Posted by min7b5

“I just missed a note and now everyone knows I’m a fraud..” -the list never ends. But I just keep coming back to the foot. Works for me.

I'm not sure how I feel about knowing that someone of your caliber STILL gets this thought from their monkey mind.

I mean, on the one hand it's nice to know we have that in common.

On the other hand, you mean it never goes away???

[Shortfinger]

It's easy if you live in Colorado.

[rollypolly]

Hey OP, maybe I can help you feel better. I have severe stage fright and nerves , even when I play in front of my guitar teacher, I usually can only play at 50% the level I play at when I'm alone. Even when I try to record myself, that red dot makes me play like crap. I know, it's stupid, but just telling you so you'll know there are others who are much more nervous than you, and you can kill it.

[rmp]

Originally Posted by Goat Mick

So the audience is already pulling for you and all you have to do is deliver the songs and they don't have to be delivered perfectly. Just give it your all and put your heart into it and you'll be a hit.

That's kind of the mental part of it right there. Repetition helps too the more you do it, the less of a big deal it gets. Managing our own expectations can be a rat hole.

The first time I did a solo gig at restaurant / pub, I was sitting there about 10 minutes before go time thinking "crap.. What have I gotten myself into?"

But, I set out to do it, I prepped for it I was as ready as I was ever gonna be so ok... "lets do it"

Turned into a great night, the people sitting around having dinner and drinks liked what I was doing, lots of good feed back. Was it perfect? no.. was it plenty good enough? Yes..

Got hired back a few more times, and took on a few more places soon after. From there, I was on my way.

As a player, you are who you are. Your voice, your playing style. You own it, so all you can do is give your best shot, don't take any of it too seriously and -- have fun!

[Bushleague]

Originally Posted by nbs2005

Hi all,

I've been trying to get more comfortable onstage doing open mics; I've done less than two dozen so still very early in the journey. It still amazes me how something I can easily play at home or even in front of a few friends jamming gets so freaking difficult on stage. A good tip I got was start with a really simple song for your first to get warmed up and embellish the changes/picking as you work through the song and get comfortable. I also got to take advantage of a green room last night spending some time before going up getting warmed up. What else do you do?

I know open mics are tough as you basically have 2 songs to develop a rapport; a nearly impossible task. But this is the only way I can get in front of folks right now.

Thanks,

Jeff

For me its all a head game, so I have a couple different ways I get myself confortable.

The first is to tell myself that the audience is probably going to hate my songs anyways, so therefore it really doesnt even matter how well I do... (hopefully this isnt true, but its often what I tell myself prior to taking the stage). By extension I sometimes get myself into a self centered jerk kind of a frame of mind ("This is all about me anyway, and they are darn well going to listen, wheather they like it or not).

So often by the time I get on stage I'm sort of aproaching the show as if I'm confronting the audience, as if the whole performance is some kind of conflict between me and them that I'm determined to win. I deffinately do not treat the audience as such, but for some reason aproaching the show as if it were a hockey game or a fist fight makes me feel way more comfortable.

[min7b5]

Originally Posted by Skarsaune

...you mean it never goes away???

Nope
I mean, I guess I kinda agree it gets better with experience, but I also think that gets tossed around a little too much too. There's not shortage of stories of very famous people that suffer from have stage freight their whole career. I don't have stage freight, but I definitely play a lot better at home. Most of us lose certain percent when we get up there, which is why I mentioned over-preparing, or at least working much harder than you might think.

Incidentally I have three friends that I play with that are sideman to some of the biggest stars in music and I'm convinced they're missing a chromosome or something -like assassins- I think that's a part of that job for sure. They seemingly just don't physiologically have it in them to get nervous. I've been with Mark when he was within a day of playing live at the Grammys, or at the White House.. And it's the most casual thing in the world. That certinally wouldn't be me