So I'll preface this by stating that IS intended to be a light-hearted joke of sorts....
If it is one of those heavily spotted pickguards that some Blueridge's sport, I'm sure the pickguard is just trying to escape to go hide somewhere where nobody will see it. I would view this as a blessing in disguise to go replace with a more attractive (to these eyes) pickguard.
Ok...go ahead...flame me now. I deserve it.