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#1
02-13-2017, 08:04 PM
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Best punch lines
I've been playing monthly neighborhood poker with the same cast of characters for 25 years. We're all good friends and there's always a new joke or two. After all these years we're at the point where the same jokes have been told so many times, we just tell a punch line and everyone roars.
What's your best punchline? For example (and these are deliberately familiar): Why the long face? Put it on my bill. A good goat will do that. (Ok, maybe not so familiar but always gets a laugh.) Don't give us the whole joke. Just the punch line. 
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#2
02-13-2017, 08:13 PM
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"Said the actress to the Bishop."
"Keep the tip."
__________________
Brucebubs 1972 - Takamine D-70 2014 - Alvarez ABT60 Baritone 2015 - Kittis RBJ-195 Jumbo 2012 - Dan Dubowski#61 2018 - Rickenbacker 4003 Fireglo 2020 - Gibson Custom Shop Historic 1957 SJ-200 2021 - Epiphone 'IBG' Hummingbird
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#5
02-13-2017, 08:35 PM
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"That's what she said"
__________________
Steve Taylor 514ce FLTD, Sitka/Tasmanian Blackwood from Ted at LA Guitar Sales Taylor 618e 1st Edition, Sitka/maple (2015) Taylor 814ce, Sitka/Rosewood (2014) Taylor 526ce, all Mahogany (2014) Baby Taylor, mahogany (2014) Taylor 210ce (2014) (on consignment) PRS S2 Custom semi-hollow body Fender Blacktop Stratocaster Gibson Les Paul Studio Pro 120th Gibson SG Classic 120th
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#6
02-13-2017, 09:09 PM
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"I do that on the way back into the kitchen"
"I'm Svindberg the tailor, you want Svindberg the terrorist - he lives in apartment 14C"
__________________
"Mistaking silence for weakness and contempt for fear is the final, fatal error of a fool" - Sicilian proverb (paraphrased)
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#7
02-13-2017, 09:12 PM
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When someone stumbles on a word, "That's easy for you to say."
When someone starts telling you about something that went wrong, "Oh, you get that on the big jobs."
__________________
Brucebubs 1972 - Takamine D-70 2014 - Alvarez ABT60 Baritone 2015 - Kittis RBJ-195 Jumbo 2012 - Dan Dubowski#61 2018 - Rickenbacker 4003 Fireglo 2020 - Gibson Custom Shop Historic 1957 SJ-200 2021 - Epiphone 'IBG' Hummingbird
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#8
02-13-2017, 09:58 PM
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"Remains to be seen..."
"You, your Hibachi, and your friend... get out of here!" "I didn't know they had a drink named Tom Collins!"
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#10
02-14-2017, 06:55 AM
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"SHOOT THE DOG!"
"It doesn't matter, he was too fast to pull the plow anyway." "Don't worry Father, the smartest man in the world just jumped out of the plane with my backpack on."
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#12
02-14-2017, 07:07 AM
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Badda Bing Badda Boom
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#15
02-14-2017, 09:07 AM
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Wrecked 'em? **** near killed him!
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