Song writing snafu

[1neeto]

Originally Posted by vindibona1

What's obvious on paper is the lack of minor chords. Am is a good substitution for C, you can also look for a spot to insert Em or A major.

Yep. The minor chords that fit on C are Am, Dm and Em. Play with those to give the song a little bit of pizzazz.

[1neeto]

Originally Posted by Northward

Thanks for your suggestions [emoji1303] I’ll try all of them out this afternoon.

It’s an uptempo New wave / punk type of song, (reminiscent of Devo) with few barre chords and a lot of percussive strumming on muted strings. The challenge lays in the tempo, succinct with little room for musical ornaments.

So quite straight forward.
Verse:
C - F - C
C - F - C
B - E - B
C - F - C
(All repeated x3)

Chorus:
G - D - E
G - E - C
G - D - E
G - E - C

That last C in the Chorus and first C in the verse don’t sit right with me.

It may not be one of the most talked about genre in this forum. But western pop music is western pop music in and I find that the musical knowledge in here is high.

I think part of the problem is also that you have those B and E chords that don’t exactly fit in the key of C. Change the E to Em and get rid of the B altogether since B or Bm are not chords in the key of C.

For your problem in the verse and chorus ending and starting in C, end the verse on Am and then switch to C for the chorus or vice-versa.

[Northward]

Originally Posted by 1neeto

I think part of the problem is also that you have those B and E chords that don’t exactly fit in the key of C. Change the E to Em and get rid of the B altogether since B or Bm are not chords in the key of C.

For your problem in the verse and chorus ending and starting in C, end the verse on Am and then switch to C for the chorus or vice-versa.

Right key or not, I really can’t hear an obvious crash with the B or E in the key of C.
[emoji28]

The song needs more work.

[1neeto]

Originally Posted by Northward

Right key or not, I really don’t hear a that obvious crash with the B or E in the key of C, but it’s not exactly harmonious either [emoji28]

It def needs more work.

Here’s the major and minor chords in the key of C: C F G Am Dm Em. Play around with those chords and something will click!

Also understand that those are also the chords for The key of Am.