Has anyone's playing intimidated you?

[Bluepoet]

People who play very well don't intimidate me...they inspire, usually.

I intimidate myself, because I'm that critical of myself! I try to get over myself, every time I play, especially in front of other people. I find that, once I start playing, everything else just kinda falls away, and, for a few moments, after the end of a song, I am in a euphoric zone. Then, reality hits me, again, and it's back to the ground.

I recently saw the Milk Carton Kids, in concert...they are wonderful, btw, but, at one point, they introduced a special guest, and they put it like this...

"Sometimes, you will hear a musician that is so good, it inspires you to strive all the harder, to play better. And, sometimes, you will hear a musician, that makes you want to just give up playing...this is one of the latter..."

Who was it that "intimidated" them? Julian Lage

There will always be a better musician, but, thankfully, music isn't a gunfight...!

[jwp2]

Originally Posted by Silly Moustache

No, Why should they? Musicianship is NOT a competition. Sure there are folks who can play stuff tha they can't, but no-one can play like me as well as I can. Same applies to everyone else.

This is the same way I feel about it.

[Pualee]

When I pick up a guitar, I'm intimidated by everyone, from my mom (who doesn't play), to the sales guy at GC 'demoing' that same tired like for the 50th time today.

I just choose not to worry about it and play anyway. Once the jitters are gone, it is fun again.

[RosewoodJoe]

Just about anyone else at Guitar Center intimidates me, except maybe a teenager, playing a pointy, with bumble bee fuzz coming out of a line6 amp. With that guy, I can always play a blues lick and bend a string and think see, I can play with emotion. Try that on for size, kid!

[PhillipT]

When I was getting into mandolin several years ago, my friend at work - a long time guitar player - took at look at it when I showed it to him. He fiddled with it for about 30 seconds and said, "Oh, it's like an upside-down guitar!" Immediately after that comment, he played the solo opening to a song, and played about a minute into the song, switched to do that for a few more songs and then said, "Yeah, that's a fun little instrument!"

Punk.

I've known him for years. He truly had NO experience on mandolin at that point. He's just very knowledgeable regarding music theory.

But I love it. He's a great resource and it's always helpful and inspiring to learn from him. He plays in a band called "Great Disturbance". We got really into Star Wars books some years back, and he and another co-worker who is also a fan of Star Wars books put together a joke band to keep their skills sharp, and it started to take off. Funny story, but way cool.

[H165]

When I run into a far superior player my reaction is generally to think "Wow, this player puts in WAY more time than I do".

I am more motivated than intimidated. Finding time to reach that level has always eluded me.

[Toby Walker]

Originally Posted by Silly Moustache

No, Why should they? Musicianship is NOT a competition. Sure there are folks who can play stuff tha they can't, but no-one can play like me as well as I can. Same applies to everyone else.

Why the negative connotation on the word 'competition?' Instead, think of it as a healthy competition, especially at a bluegrass jam where soloists on the same type of instrument are following each other. While it may not be overtly stated, I've seen plenty of folks trying to out-gun each other, or at the very least trying to hold their own. It's the competitive nature that can actually improve one's playing.

[jfitz81]

Originally Posted by Toby Walker

Why the negative connotation on the word 'competition?' Instead, think of it as a healthy competition, especially at a bluegrass jam where soloists on the same type of instrument are following each other. While it may not be overtly stated, I've seen plenty of folks trying to out-gun each other, or at the very least trying to hold their own. It's the competitive nature that can actually improve one's playing.

Agreed. For me (I'm not very good) it was hard to sit in on a jam and feel like everyone else was completely out of my league. So I didn't for a long time. But I've since realized the best way to get better is to play with better players. Plus, I tried put myself if their shoes: I've played with people that I knew I was better than (not a lot), and not once has their playing ever bothered me--it's still fun. I figure if my poor playing really offends anyone, they need to get over themselves. Your father doesn't sound like someone who's going to look down on an aspiring musician.

[Jason Paul]

As far as your dad being able to listen to a song and be playing along within a few minutes; yes, that takes a good ear, but it might be easier than you think.

As you keep learning songs, you hear several of the same chord progressions over and over again, or that a certain chord often comes right before another chord, such as ending a phrase with V-I.

You can learn to recognize when a chord goes from I to V, versus I to IV, etc.

When you do this for a few years, it will become much more natural.

And let me encourage you to stick with it. My playing has always been on and off. I started when I was about 10 (now 45). But, I only played for a year or two. Then I picked it up again when I was about 15, and played steadily for about six years. But then got married and stopped for almost 20 years, with only the occasional playing at a guitar shop or a friend's house who had a guitar.

Even recently I started playing again (acoustic this time) a few years ago (when I joined here, and got a 314ce). I played somewhat regularly, but have dropped off again for maybe two years (wife is not supportive at the moment). Now, I'd like to pick it up again, but don't want to fight with her about it.

Anyway - the point is; every time I have a period without playing, I end up feeling almost like I'm starting over from scratch. I mean, I remember a lot, but not everything, and of course the mind-muscle connection has to be rebuilt, along with the callouses.

Jason

[Warrenaines]

Originally Posted by Bluepoet

People who play very well don't intimidate me...they inspire, usually.

This.

As for your dad being able to play well and especially to play along by ear to lots of different music, this is not easy and extremely unlikely for anyone with 6 months of music under their belt. If your dad could've done that after 6 months, hats off to him, he's in the .01% of players in that regard.

If playing by ear is a goal of yours, put a lot of energy into doing that. It's a learned process for virtually everyone, there's still somewhat of a pervasive myth that only a select very gifted few are born with this ability and everyone else can't. Some get it faster than others either by nature or experience with a different instrument, but it usually takes a lot of time.

I can't play by ear very well. I think it would be incredibly rewarding, but I almost solely play for personal enjoyment at night and not with a band so I spend my limited amount of time on stuff I enjoy more -- most of what I can play by ear is (to piggyback off of Jason Paul) a byproduct of playing and thus learning common keys and progressions, and enjoying listening to music. I've been playing on and off for 20+ years (long periods of off) and wish I would've started developing my ear when I was playing a lot starting out, but nothing I can do about it now and my guitar time is now limited w/ wife/kids/job. That said, the few times I've focused on improving my ear it has helped quite a bit.

While there's a lot of tabs and sometimes an overwhelming amount of information online, there are a lot of helpful tools online to help you learn to play by ear somewhat faster than just listening to songs. Playing by listening to actual songs is obviously important, but can slow things down when starting out.

Among other valuable tools that Justinguitar.com has is spending time developing your ear at the beginning among learning chords, technique, etc.. There may be better resources for strictly developing your ear, but just a thought as Justinguitar.com is also a very good (largely free) resource for forming a good base of various things.

[Jusca]

Not at all. I've never been intimidated. Anything that person knows, I can learn too in time. I've been inspired a lot.

[Mooh]

I used to be intimidated by great players, but I eventually came to realize that the world is a big place with room for every level of achievement.

If someone is intimidated by me, I certainly don't set out to do that.

[colchar]

Originally Posted by D.Traylor

I've been learning guitar for around six months now and have to say I think it's coming pretty easy. I can play quite a few chords, change them quickly, have gotten the F chord in all three versions and have learned the chords to quite a few songs that I sit around singing & playing & occasionally my woman sings along also.

It's fun and I'm enjoying learning while trying to improve what I already know.

Now, where I choke. My father self taught himself to play guitar, long before youtube and the web. He is in his early 70's and started when he was about thirteen.

If he hasn't heard a song before, he can close his eyes, listen and within a few minutes he's playing right along. He also travels thru his church work and plays with many different groups. He plays a lot of lead when he is with a group. And by the way, he doesn't read music. He says he plays by ear.

I've had a couple good guitar players show me some stuff and had fun, but I can't get myself show my father what I can do yet quite frankly because I feel my skills are so low compared to his that it's embarrassing.

We do not have issues and we are also both in the building trades and often work together, he hasn't slowed at all with age.

Anyway, I didn't know where else to put this and was wondering if anyone else has ever felt this way and if so, how did you handle it. I typically don't feel this way about anything. Thanks.

After playing for six months why would you be intimidated by someone who has played for more than fifty years? Unless that person is terrible it is only common sense that they would be better than you, much better in fact.

Play for him and with him. I am sure he would be glad to see your progress and to help teach/guide you. That is something you could share together and from which lasting memories would be created (ones that would last long after he is gone and that would enable you to maintain a connection with him after he is gone as all of our parents eventually will be).

[David M123]

Yeah, I used to be intimidated by better players. When I was a real newby (like 6 months or so and starting to feel like I was learning something) my guitar-playing buddy and mentor introduced me to the local guitar hero, a girl ( High School Senior class, I was a Junior) who played in a professional band, a bluegrass trio. She handed me her gasp... Martin D-18 and I promptly mangled a C chord. After a little fumbling, I handed it back with an apologetic smile.

Actually, I didn't find the guitar all that great, which surprised me as I knew that Martins were supposed to be the class of the acoustic guitar world. At the time I didn't know why it was so hard to play. Now, I look back and understand that she had heavy strings and a very high action for really digging in on bluegrass numbers. It's no wonder my newby fingers couldn't handle it.

Until a few years ago, I was always very shy about playing in public of any sort, even in guitar stores. Then one day I was auditioning guitars with an eye to buying one. It was a little Mom and Pop shop and there were a few people around, including a kid waiting for his lesson and his mother, dropping him off. I was playing a fingerstyle fiddle tune that I like a lot and am comfortable with. After a few minutes, I looked up and found that everyone in the store was tapping their feet in time to me. At that point, I started to think "Hey, maybe I'm OK after all..."

Keep at it and you'll have that moment too.

p.s. the girl and the band were Laura Thompson and Three-Legged Horse, if anybody remembers them.