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  #1  
Old 03-29-2008, 02:35 PM
HereIGoAgain HereIGoAgain is offline
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Default Top Tens again

I feel like doing this:

Top Ten Signs You Need Real Help:

10) You're worried about global warming as you get ready to shovel snow at the end of March and you live in Ohio.

9) You remember the date your bought your first guitar, but you can't remember your wife's birthday to save your life.

8) Everyone yells "NORM!" when you walk into a bar, and your name's not Norm.

7) It's a Saturday afternoon, and you're posting Top Ten lists.

6) You were diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder the same day you phoned in a custom Taylor order.

5) You live less than one mile away from your ex-spouse.

4) You think Stevie Ray Vaughan's "Cold Shot" is about a setting on a Revlon Hairdryer.

3) The happiest day for you this year was the day you found out Taylor Swift turned 18.

2) Your nervous breakdown is the most-often viewed piece on Youtube.

And the #1 Sign You Need Real Help is:

1) Youv'e complained about feminine hygiene products being referred to on the AGF.

Go ahead, let 'er rip folks.
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  #2  
Old 03-29-2008, 08:00 PM
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Mary Mary is offline
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OK - I can do this....

Top ten reasons when you know you need help:

10) When you can't read the calendar, but remember that you wrote something important so you wouldn't forget.

9) When you brag about being an expert at playing "Air Guitar."

8) When others allow you to play air guitar in front of them.

7) When you are stupid enough to let the video camera be on during that 'air guitar concert.'

6) When you invite others to join you, the camera man pretends it is on the others, but it's a little funny how the video camera never sees THEIR faces!!!!!!!!!!

5) When it is cold outside, but you will drive 10 miles for a mocha frappucino.

4) When you get a 'headache' from drinking that stupid frappucino so quickly on that cold day in Ohio.

3) When, the next day, your daughter says she is going to visit a friend and you ask if she will stop and get a frappucino for you, but please drove fast so it will still be frozen when she gets home, which will cause you to complain about another ice cream headache.

2) When you are doing top ten lists when you have a Sunday School lesson that needs prepared.

And the #1 reason.......

Is when your husband refuses to help you with a top ten list because he says HE doesn't need help and he is not stupid enough to play Air Guitar in front of a camera and he doesn't drink nasty frappucinos just because YOU do. And, your son says, "Mom, this top ten list took you how long to make???"
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  #3  
Old 03-29-2008, 08:17 PM
T-- T-- is offline
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10) you still call it global warming and not climate change.

Oh shoot, thanks Mary. Gotta run put together a set list for the Sunday School kids.
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  #4  
Old 03-29-2008, 08:27 PM
HereIGoAgain HereIGoAgain is offline
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Good one Mary. If it helps, the top tens can be on any topic.

I was just in commonly rare form when I wrote mine.
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