Ohmigosh, what can I say?

[Karaokemonk]

I was not calling HER trash.
I think you know what the idiom means---We all have different tastes.

[fongie]

Originally Posted by Glennwillow

Some people who are 'terrible" can actually make a living making music. I'd suggest that you keep your opinion to yourself and let him have his fun.

- Glenn

Hey, hey

One thing I've learnt, never put someone else down.

[Dempseystudio]

Originally Posted by Goodallboy

...

Several people have asked to play guitar with me and after one session if I knew it wasn't workable I just didn't make an effort to hook up again. No hurt feelings and no unsolicited opinions had to change hands.

...

Spot on advice IMHO.

I'm new here . Do we do "+1" ?

[Brucebubs]

You could always encourage your friend to enter one of the many 'hidden talent' reality shows that are on television at the moment.
If he's as bad as you say then they'll be the ones to tell him, not you.
Face saved, still friends.

[Charmed Life Picks]

Originally Posted by sbeirnes

I suggest you jam with the guy a couple of times. He might improve. Sometimes playing with another person can really help a player improve.

Also, record him doing his thing and then play it back for him. He might not know how bad it really sounds.

Yeah, I can relate. Now, I'm not Paul Simon, but there's this one guy in my acoustic jamming group who cannot sing and also cannot keep a beat. Very nice guy playing a very nice Martin, but, Dude, a reality check here. At our last jam I arrived late and took the last seat available -- the one right next to him. Now I know why that seat was empty. When it was my turn I played a very slow, simple Prine song. His rhythm was so bad I could barely get through the song. I moved my seat ASAP.

Not sure how to solve your problem, but I don't understand how some people have no sense of how they sound to others. Don't they listen to ANY music?

[Scootch]

Originally Posted by Guitarfish

I have a dilemma. I recently listened to an aquaitance show me his stuff, singing and guitar playing. Here is the problem;

My gosh, he's horrible but thinks he can make money from gigs. I mean nails on a chalkboard voice and no sense of timing at all. Luckily I didn't bust out laughing, as I thought he was doing a comedy routine at first. He mistook my smile for appreciation of his fine skills. The dilemma? Well.....

I never get the chance to play with others, so I grabbed at the chance to play along with someone else. Now he wants to hang out.

Don't get me wrong, thiis is not me being holier-than-thou. He has been playing for years and years and has no idea. I cannot see a way to be honest here. Momma said 'if you don't have anything good to say'........

I hope I don't get blasted here for being an elitist. I am well aware that I am a long term beginner level. There is no way he'll hear me if I did offer an opinion.

I'm not talking getting used to a Dylan-esque voice here folks. But he is having so much fun that I don't have the heart to pop a bubble.

Honest suggestions?

Hey! Is that you, Jerry? I didn't know you felt that way.

[Paully]

Dude,
Don't be a wuss. Look him square in the eye and say "man that's some extreme suckage".
Then grab his guitar out of his hands and do the Bluto with it against the closest wall.
Then tell him that as far as jamming together you wouldn't pi$$ in his mouth if his neck was on fire.Guaranteed problem solved.

[Hotspur]

Well, I'm reminded of the Lionel Hutz line: "There's the truth, and then there's the truth."

That probably only makes sense to people who have seen that episode.

Okay. So what do you do?

You have to decide what your goal is: is it to just not play with him, or is it to nudge him towards working harder and becoming better?

The first is much easier than the latter. This happens all the time. Two people jam once. One of them isn't feeling it. You mumble something about "not feeling that much of a musical connection," wish them luck and move on. It's like going on a date and deciding you don't want a second one. You don't tell her she breath stinks or she's not smart enough or she kisses like a gagging goldfish, you just say you weren't really feeling it, say you had a nice time, and move along.

I mean, this happened to me recently with a singer. She has no sense of timing and always thought I was slowing down. (I'm self-conscious enough that I worried that she was right, so I pulled out the metronome. I was playing fine). We also didn't really connect on what kind of music we wanted to do. Two sessions, and we just sort of stopped trying to arrange a third. But that one was mutual. Too bad because she's got great pipes but that's not enough.

The second is harder, and is opening a bigger can of worms. On one hand, it's not your job. But there are ways to phrase this nicely, even still: "I've been working with a metronome a lot and it's really helped me. I recommend it - I can't believe how helpful it was." "There's something raw and powerful in your voice, but I can hear the way it sounds kinda untrained, too. I bet a few lessons would help get you to a place that kicked ***."

There are some white lies in there, but they nudge the person in the right direction, and maybe they get it. And if they don't, it's not your problem.

[Chin music]

Originally Posted by DaveKell

Im honestly curious as to whether he is worse than me. I used to be able to sing quite well. After 18 major surgeries and being hospitalized up to 6 months at a time, I have extensive lung scarring from numerous bouts of fluid build up. Still, I recorded my own demo of a protest song I wrote awhile back. So tell me, how bad is he compared to this?
https://soundcloud.com/david-kellems...e-founders-pro

I thought that was quite good actually - your voice has character, a certain weariness to it, that is very expressive. You'd have to be selective in your song choices obviously, but that voice could hold its own playing out in the proper venue.

[DaveKell]

Originally Posted by Chin music

I thought that was quite good actually - your voice has character, a certain weariness to it, that is very expressive. You'd have to be selective in your song choices obviously, but that voice could hold its own playing out in the proper venue.

I'm astounded, literally, at the three positive reviews. A friend of mine, Randy Handley, who is a great Nashville based songwriter and bluesman said my voice made the song "believable". I figured he was just being a good friend. Thanks all of you. You've given me a desire to explore singing with my new, medically induced voice again! (And I DO intend to keep writing).

[Garrison314]

Originally Posted by duluthdan

Actually, this is pretty good... very Neil Youngish - would love to hear this done on a Groaning Les Paul thru a good Marshall! You've got a great cowboy voice. Keep writin' !
OP: Silence is a virtue here.

I agree....take turns with a couple other singers and he has a pretty good band.

[jjbigfly]

I had this very same issue with the person I play with. No skills and no timing and no voice. He started some lessons (a few years ago) but the instructor failed to return after a few lessons. I told him that I would show him what little that I know. It was a tough go in the beginning, but he slowly improved.

"Good things come to those who wait."

He got to be quite decent and he is usually a dream to play with. He seems to know exactly what I am going to do when making small changes to the many tunes we play. I can change the exit to any song and he never misses it. Timing and beat, whatever, like he can read my mind. Now I can't find anyone that plays as well with me.....Played with some VERY skilled players, but few that mesh nearly as well.

[Kip Carter]

Originally Posted by jjbigfly

I had this very same issue with the person I play with. No skills and no timing and no voice. He started some lessons (a few years ago) but the instructor failed to return after a few lessons. I told him that I would show him what little that I know. It was a tough go in the beginning, but he slowly improved.

"Good things come to those who wait."

He got to be quite decent and he is usually a dream to play with. He seems to know exactly what I am going to do when making small changes to the many tunes we play. I can change the exit to any song and he never misses it. Timing and beat, whatever, like he can read my mind. Now I can't find anyone that plays as well with me.....Played with some VERY skilled players, but few that mesh nearly as well.

Helping another along is a gift of self and often reaps rewards beyond anything we can imagine. Thanks!

[Gasworker]

honesty is not all it's cracked up to be. Next thing you know you will be telling parents their babies are ugly. It's just an acquaintance, smile and wave.

[drumstrummer]

When his career takes off, won't this will be an amusing footnote!