Quote:
Originally Posted by Br1ck
I was in a band with a very good guitarist who was both egocentric and a control freak. Lasted 25 years. Why? He was the best guitar player I will ever play with, and the drummer was too. Our singer could sell a song and we did a lot of three part harmonies. We didn't play out much because the pay compared to day job money was laughable. We did weddings and birthdays and wakes, mostly for friends. Winery private parties were a blast. I can't recall one song that wasn't chosen by the lead guitarist. He had really good taste and we played a lot of Steely Dan, some Pat Metheny and Weather Report and a whole lot of Kinks, Who, Hendrix and Cream, and of course Beatles.
Many times I had to weigh the good and the bad and choose. That is what you have to do. Pluses have to outnumber minuses. When circumstance led to the breakup, just life change moving away stuff, I was inundated with requests to play in bands. I was a good bass player. I declined because the musicians weren't as good as I was used to. I didn't want to be in a band where I was better than at least one guitarist.
I've focused on solo original acoustic music ever sense. Finding four or five people with common outlook and goals, and who really want to work at it is very, very hard. You really are dealing with significant others too. And drummers, don't get me started.....
Even a duo is hard. I like to think I bring a lot to the table. I can play guitar, mandolin, bass and some dobro and sing harmony, all at a decent if not stellar level. Do I want to form a duo with a singer songwriter who strums only, and won't learn harmony? How will that satisfy me and my songs? I need another me. Where is a clone when you need one? Yes, I fully realize my attitude would be counter productive. Should I ever meet someone whose talent was such that I'd enjoy backing him or her up, I'd be all in. Gladly.
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I agree completely with you on the difficulty of finding other musicians who can "synergize" and work together in a harmonious group. When I find musicians who I can work well with they either dont have the time because of other commitments or just dont want to. The ones I have found that are at my level or better and can commit to something regular are not for me to be found. Now occasionally I have encountered really good ones that wanted to do something but their egos and personalities did not jive with me. And if I cant enjoy what I am doing I dont want to do it.
I had the opportunity to sing back up vocals for a locally famous female singer in my area for a big concert at a park that had almost 3000 people in attendance. When she was on stage she gave the persona of a very engaging, sensitive person alive with life and passion at prior concerts I had witnessed. I heard her sing quite a few times and was impressed. But when I met at rehearsals before the show, she was an arrogant, bossy musician acting almost like a goddess. It turned me off so much that I did 2 performances with her and never again even though I was asked again.
When I am listening to live music and the performers egotism hangs out for all to see, it turns me off totally. I dont want to hear it anymore. A lot of the big stage performers have long taken the cue and always put on a humble act even if they are not and really have raging egos.