The Acoustic Guitar Forum

The Acoustic Guitar Forum (https://www.acousticguitarforum.com/forums/index.php)
-   Open Mic (https://www.acousticguitarforum.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=12)
-   -   Best punch lines (https://www.acousticguitarforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=459872)

Slothead56 02-13-2017 08:04 PM

Best punch lines
 
I've been playing monthly neighborhood poker with the same cast of characters for 25 years. We're all good friends and there's always a new joke or two. After all these years we're at the point where the same jokes have been told so many times, we just tell a punch line and everyone roars.

What's your best punchline? For example (and these are deliberately familiar):
Why the long face?
Put it on my bill.
A good goat will do that. (Ok, maybe not so familiar but always gets a laugh.)

Don't give us the whole joke. Just the punch line.

Brucebubs 02-13-2017 08:13 PM

"Said the actress to the Bishop."

"Keep the tip."

Long Jon 02-13-2017 08:21 PM

Funeral Director "So, everything worked out fine, all we had to do was swap the heads."

Long Jon 02-13-2017 08:31 PM

"Almost made it, then I couldn't help starting to laugh, I saw the other guy coming, with 50 COCONUTS !.. "

sled 02-13-2017 08:35 PM

"That's what she said"

Steve DeRosa 02-13-2017 09:09 PM

"I do that on the way back into the kitchen"

"I'm Svindberg the tailor, you want Svindberg the terrorist - he lives in apartment 14C"

Brucebubs 02-13-2017 09:12 PM

When someone stumbles on a word, "That's easy for you to say."

When someone starts telling you about something that went wrong, "Oh, you get that on the big jobs."

LouieAtienza 02-13-2017 09:58 PM

"Remains to be seen..."

"You, your Hibachi, and your friend... get out of here!"

"I didn't know they had a drink named Tom Collins!"

LSemmens 02-14-2017 03:24 AM

Think about it, who's he going to tell.........

sevargnhoj 02-14-2017 06:55 AM

"SHOOT THE DOG!"

"It doesn't matter, he was too fast to pull the plow anyway."

"Don't worry Father, the smartest man in the world just jumped out of the plane with my backpack on."

leew3 02-14-2017 06:58 AM

punch line
 
"Why would you have a drink named 'Chuck'"

BrunoBlack 02-14-2017 07:07 AM

Badda Bing Badda Boom

ewalling 02-14-2017 07:28 AM

Who's Bob?

Long Jon 02-14-2017 09:04 AM

No, no,,,, you're supposed to use the camel to ride to town !

mr. beaumont 02-14-2017 09:07 AM

Wrecked 'em? **** near killed him!


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:23 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, The Acoustic Guitar Forum

vB Ad Management by =RedTyger=